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Feeling useless

Anxious_MummaContributor23 Sept 2022, 9:03 pm AEST

Feeling useless

I have been battling depression and anxiety since i was a teenager.

I have been with my husband for 16 and the last couple of years have been hard.

I dont feel up to being intimate due to many reasons and this has lead to some marital difficulties. We ended up in counselling and that helped for a while.

I understand that he wants to be intimate but i just feel numb and he didnt really understand.

Now he gets his intimacy from other means and although I say im fine with it, as he stops asking me, but now if I just feel useless. Like im a house mate or just his live in maid as i do everything for the kids and all the housework and he doesnt help at all.

I just feel useless and a failure as a wife and person

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In response to: Feeling useless

Anxious_MummaContributor24 Sept 2022, 8:48 pm AEST

Re: Feeling useless

@Little_Leopard I have thought of that, but there are kids involved and have seen what a separation will do to them. Not sure i can put my kids through that.

In response to: Re: Feeling useless

Little_LeopardSenior Contributor24 Sept 2022, 9:48 pm AEST

Re: Feeling useless

@Anxious_Mumma

I think the children are better of with a happy and healthy mumma than a depressed and deflated mumma.

Separation is not pleasant but it can be done amicably in a way that is good role modelling for the kids.

Would you want your kids to stay in a relationship that they were miserable in?

plus you don’t need to go through this by yourself. You could talk first with a psychologist and ask for family support.
Or are there other things holding you back.

I am genuinely worried about your situation. I feel that you feel trapped and sad. I want you to know that you have the power and control to do what you need to do. What ever that is.

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