Losing it and everything...

Hi @chibam

Finding a therapist can be really challenging as we create professional relationships with them. These are just like other relationships and we need to have a connection and like the way they work. I know I had my share of psychologists and wouldn't go back to some after a session. It can be worth it though to search for the right person to support you!

Sitting with you while you work through this challenge!

Take care

RiverSeal

@RiverSealAs I alluded to earlier, it goes well beyond the quality of the person, and whatever clarity of connection we are able to build with them. A major factor is "the golden rule of therapy" - the guideline that most therapists adhere to that forbids them from giving actual practical assistance to their patients.

So unless I am able to get a therapist that doesn't adhere to that rule, and actually does help patients with their real-life problems (not just the "head problems" that result from them), there isn't any point.

Hi @chibam

It sounds like you have not been supported by someone who practices "person-centred" treatment. Putting the person at the centre of their treatment and looking at all aspects of their life that could be contributing to their mental health.

It is an approach that you could search for and perhaps connect with the therapist before you have a session to ask if they work in this way.

I acknowledge that your experience was not great and this should not happen. We could do without having to filter through supports that are just not delivered how support should.

Just some thoughts I have to share with you!

Take care

RiverSeal

@RiverSealTBH, I'm starting to get a bit fed-up with all the new jargon that's starting to dominate the mental health arena. "Person-centered", "psychosocial", "missing middle"... Terms that look big, fancy and cutting-edge, but which tell you absolutely nothing. And when you ask about the actual definitions of these terms, you end up feeling like this meme:

I wish people would just say, in plain, simple english, what sort of assistance they do and don't provide to patients, and that there was some easy way to seek out therapists who provide the specific services your looking for; without having to figure out the real meaning of ambiguous terms like "person-centered" and "psychosocial". TBH, I get the impression that even the people who've invented these terms and who promote their regular usage don't even really know what they mean.

I'm sorry if I come across as argumentative or hostile on this matter. That's certainly not my intention.🙂 But I've been trying to wade through this environment for ages, and things only get murkier and murkier the deeper I venture, never clearer. I hope you can appreciate how frustrating that gets.

Hi @chibam

I can definitely appreciate the frustration that you are going through! And yes there are a lot of new terms and approaches out there to wade through in the mental health environment.

Thank you for having this discussion with me tonight and letting me sit with your thoughts for a while.

Strong minds and hearts are what get us through these challenging times and help us in the recovery journey. All you have done is shown yours and shared your experiences and I respect that.

I'm signing off now! Have a good night. 😊

Take care

RiverSeal

Laughed out loud at your meme, @chibam, and it's ongoing. Thanks buddy!😊🤣

You'd be such a character to know.

Yes, I'm OK @chibam. I hope you are too. I deleted it because I'm sick of repeating the same thing, like I'm stuck there. And it's not a good place to be.

And, additionally, I'm still trying to understand my ex-psy. I'm sure others may find that difficult to understand, but he has done my head in. He had played my friend and ally, then he took me from all's well to suicidal in a moment. I was bewildered beyond description. Over the past several years, I have replayed my entire treatment and conversations with him to understand what I did wrong, or how I had got him so wrong, so these swings and roundabouts have been inevitable. Memories mixed with current trauma. It's been hell but necessary to unravel it.

It's never going to be alright.

Thank you for your concern, @chibam . I hope you're doing OK too. I send best wishes to you. Cheers😊.

Good morning, @Appleblossom. Another day, another lot of new experiences. My weather forecast says 11 degrees and rain today. EEK!

I'm OK today. Forumites have saved the day again. I hope you're OK too. Have a good day.

Take care.

Thanks @Historylover

Weather lousy here too.

Did a job on computer and piano. Gotta go to Gp.

Son is doing dinner.

Could be a good day despite the rain.

edit: cos read your reply to @chibam

I still get random insights from 'supposedly therapeutic' relationships in the past ( eg 1980s and 1990s). I am using them to learn more about being assertive in social circumstances instead of an open book who is too sensitive ... I was less wounded by more recent people, but the damage done from back then is still with me cos of family constellations. Actually not possible to get over, but the best I can do is learn from it.

@Historylover, Yes, the meme is a good one, isn't it? It always cracks me up, every time I see it. 😂

Glad to hear your feeling better today. 🙂

Wishing you all the best, as always. 🙂🤗