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Something’s not right

Struggling: TW suicide

Struggling: TW suicide

I have been struggling a lot lately with suicidal thoughts. It’s become a daily occurrence and it’s been really overwhelming to cope. I am safe right but having to fight this is very exhausting. I feel so trapped, I am tired of living in pain, fear and shame. I feel like a burden to people and unimportant.

1711 replies

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In response to: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Former-Member physical pain can be very exhausting and I admire the strength it's taken you to get here. We are here right with you.

I'm working on the assignment due next Monday but it feels like my head is on fire right now and I can't think with this migraine even though I have so much to do. I think I'm just cranky, had a close suicide attempt on the weekend, and I'm trying to manage my emotions and uni and have a really bad migraine right now and feel sick to my stomach.

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Dinner has made me feel really nauseous today and head still feels heavy. Don’t know if I can do any uni stuff done this evening. I sure hope I can do it, since the assignment due date is the extension due date.

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

What is your assessment on @creative_writer? I never work well under pressure, maybe that is playing a part in how you feel tonight as well?

I’m here if you need a hand, or some support with trying to get going on it.

xx

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Former-Memberit’s a research proposal. I only really chose my topic today. I know I have until Monday and there is still time, but I get really worked up when there isn’t enough progress going on. Didn’t get much done today. I spent much of today stressing out over flashbacks and the chaos in my life and had reach out because my mental health isn’t great. Xx

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Well @creative_writer, you definitely prioritised your day and sought the most important things first. Your mental health is the cornerstone of progress and getting other things done. I understand it can feel frustrating to feel like you are working, hard, mentally, and still not feeling like you are progressing. Try not to be hard on yourself, uni is really hard.

Do you have some ideas? Do you like research? I thought that I would not like it, but after doing my very first research unit at uni, I knew that it was something I wanted to do as a career. So many people don’t like it though. I’d love to hear some of your ideas if you want to share?

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Former-Member I was moving too slowly and felt like I had to reach out and talk through things. I was seriously considering suicide on Sunday and started to take action until my sister and mum walked in and then I pretended I was doing nothing. I didn’t get to do it and I was okay, but I could’ve completely lost it if nobody was around.

I’m okay with research. I wish we actually were able to do research instead of just making a proposal. I suppose social work isn’t so much research based as psych is. Like when I was doing my fourth year psych we had to do a research proposal, write a thesis and had a supervisor that helped us out.

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Yeah, just the proposal is like a little tease isn’t it. You don’t actually get to find out about any of it. So annoying.

And I am really sorry to hear about Sunday, I am really relieved that you are here and on the forums tonight. I try to reach out to the connections that I have made, especially after a week off, because I worry about everybody’s safety. It must be very scary when you are with those thoughts. I can’t even begin to understand but I am glad you’re here xx

@creative_writer

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Former-Member I wish they could have a full research project instead of just two research units. It’s way more practical.

It’s scary being trapped in thoughts. I know there is a lot of work I need to do on myself but sometimes I feel so hopeless xx

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

No one could ever claim that they didn't need to work on themselves, it is human nature to be forever changing. For some, the work is more and the fallout is harder - but they also make for the most interesting people. Being scared in your own mind is one of the most terrifying things and so many people struggle to understand that.

If you could choose a research project, no limit on time or funding, what would you choose to work on?? What are you passionate about??

For me, I would choose to work on the effects of prison on those in it and how that effects them on the outside.

@creative_writer

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Former-Member we are forever changing. Some people change more than others. I noticed a huge shift in myself when I felt like I couldn’t connect to some old friends the same way years ago. I no longer vibed with them as I did when I was younger.

I would like to study school wellbeing and sense of community and belonging.
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