florencefiftySenior Contributor
Too depressed to move.
Literally.
I can barely type.
I'm probably going to take the day off work tomorrow.
I don't really know what I'm going to do with my day off. I want to watch a movie, and go into the city to a historic shop and buy a pen I've been meaning to buy for a fair while, but never had the time. But no amount of shopping is going to make me happy.
I've come to realise that I could have been a father by now, if I had even a remotely normal recovery from getting hurt in 2019. You can't start a family with anti-depressants and self-care, now can you?
I couldn't be further from finding someone. And I really don't believe counselling and medication will work without social support. I had a woman suddenly cross the street when she saw me, at 2:30PM on a Sunday afternoon, after I had been laying in bed for three hours straight.
My own infant niece is scared of me. That's less of a pain point and more of a straight up mystery. It's funny but it's not funny. The other day I was just talking to my mum and she started crying. My sister thinks it's because of my beard. The weird thing is, sometimes she's like that and sometimes she's not. I met her when she was three days old, and I see her every week. What the [...] do you do? I'm guessing this isn't going to be a problem when she's a toddler.
I've just been wiped out... in what world is someone in this state meant to be alive?