What's the difference between voices and voices?

Hey @kato

I wonder if it might help you manage this "devil" if you changed some of his language for him, or impose subtitles when he starts up. A starting place might be the word "fun" - you could try substituting another word which feels more accurate to you - eg trouble, danger, evil etc.

I have heard that an effective way to help shizophrenia sufferers is to help tham identify which voices to listen to, and which not -rather than trying to get rid of them altogether. In a way my own journey with my internal "voices" supports that line of reasoning. It sounds like your "devil" is similar to my self-hatred one - tearing me down or urging me to do things which are damaging to me &/or others I care about.

Kind regards,

Kristin

Hey @JT (@function apparently doesn't like 2 character user names either!)

I love this "normal is the cycle on a washing machine and nothing more". It's a great way of looking at it. Let's face it we've all been through the wringer many times so who wants to be a washing machine ?

If the voice is helpful then why get rid of it? Another word for these might be intuition? If it's unhelpful then refute/block/stop it.

Kind regards,

Kristin

@kristin that is a great point changing the name of "fun" to something more appropriate.... I never considered the effects of calling it fun.

I have self hate of myself also.

I enjoy hearing others ideas and thoughts on topics it is amazing the similarities we share and the expierence of those who have been through it and have worked harde on it, it helps guide others somewhat on what to expect as a possibility of what will help.

Hey,

Good to hear from you 🙂 I like the t-shirt idea!

I think trying to be "normal" is one of the most heartbreaking things about MI. In reality I suspect it's a mask worn by the rest of society that we can't even try on. Ultimately I think that's actually a good thing (or at least I'm sure it has been for me). Funny how those of us who have supposedly got a few loose marbles are the ones who need to learn to be most real & sane.

For some reason the song "Gloria" sung by Laura Branigan comes to mind on this question. With "all the voices in her head". Wikipedia calls it a love song! What a joke If there was ever a song about MI this is surely it.

Interesting you now only get the voices at night. Sounds like you've found an effective way to lull them to sleep, very intriguing. Could they be childhood skeletons rattling maybe...? Poem below for your interest.

Kind regards,

Kristin

Skeletons

Used to be for a long time
I would run and hide in terror
Whenever the skeletons
In my closet began to rattle

Then I began
Facing up to my fears
I learned to wrench open the door
I’d grab them each in turn
By the scruff of the neck
And stare them down
Demanding to know
“Who’s giving me grief?”

Now I’m exploring a new way
I gently open the door
And simply ask them
“Who’s in pain?”

Kristin © April 2013

Hi @kato

I suspect that self-hatred is a common (maybe even consistent?) outcome from trauma. Apparently it can also arise out of excessive parental expectations. I found a couple of interesting websites which others may find helpful too. @Uggbootdiva @PeppiPatty @Maude @Happyness @Pipkin

One is an excellent article on self-hatred & developing self-compassion in its stead. http://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/how-to-turn-self-hatred-into-self-compassion-1112135#comment-171344

The other is a website with lots of good posts so I'll pin the link for the blog list page, and people can browse what they are interested in. http://www.becomingwhoyouare.net/about/ Enjoy!

Kind regards,

Kristin

Thanks everyone for your responses and glad I posted the question. I heard the washing machine thing many years ago and it was in fact related to autism funnily enough. A previous role involved autism education and I used it a lot when talking to new parents especially when helping them adjust to people who kept saying 'compared to normal' during that horrific assessment phase.

I'd love to respond to different comments but I'm being sneaky during working hours and probably shouldn't spend that much time. Besides that I'm having a real brain fog day which is making the working part of my day a tad pointless. The voices have been with me since childhood so I've long become adjusted to them being there. At least one of them is always negative and derogatory towards me so they're not always that helpful. That voice in particular is certainly a factor in my suicide attempts. Sometimes they're good company I have to admit and it's handy for playing devils advocate with myself 🙂 I don't know that I want to get rid of them but perhaps I should speak about them to my psych. But it is something to think about as I'd never considered them to be voices until I had that thought that maybe they were more than the inner voice of reason that people so commonly talk about.

You don't think it's a bit confronting for a kids book? Skeletons in one's closet is usually a more teenage/adult theme.

Cheers, K