I can’t cope

Super @Captain24 - I'm very proud of your proactive approach.

Life is not about not falling - it is about how you get up 🙂

Sorry for letting you down @tyme

You have not let me down @Captain24 . Not at all.

Be kind to yourself. You have a lot ahead of you. Hold onto that hope. 🙂 I'll speak to you tomorrow.

Good Evening, how's your day @Captain24 ? I'm gobbling peanut m&m's, but I've just put them away, so no more.

Not real good @tyme. I wish that I had succeeded yesterday. I spent most of my day just wanting to die.

I haven’t had peanut m&ms for years!

Sorry to hear that that's where things are at the moment @Captain24 . Although it's dark at the moment, it WILL pass. Sit with it.

It hailed here today. It was intense. But after a while, it DID pass. Just like our mood/emotions' weather. It WILL pass. The weather never stays sunny, nor does it stay cloudy.

I'm not sure if I've mentioned it in the past, but I have suicidal ideation everyday. It's part of my condition. But these are just thoughts. It doesn't mean you have to act on them. Neither do they define you. Keep practising parking your 'ice cream van' in those negative thoughts. I should look up that strategy to see if it has a name I can share with you.

Also, was it you that had that story about Mars bars?

My sister gave me the m&m's. They had a spare packet and they dropped it off to me.

Speak soon, tyme

I hope it passes soon. @tyme After yesterday I am not sure how safe I am. Especially if the opportunity in front of me. I need to sort out my temptation as it’s all easy access. I hope this darkness passes soon. I can’t keep living like this. I feel sick in the pit of my stomach and just want to hurt myself. Hopefully the meds kick in soon.

I don’t know how you cope with these thoughts daily.

I am ordering that picture of pixie in a diamond painting so it’ll be on my wall. I need to get better at parking my ice cream truck. I’m sure with time I will learn it.

Yea the mars bar story was me!

You have fantastic friends and family that think of you.

Hope today was good for you

I hope it will pass soon too @Captain24 . I'm hopeful.

Please remember to reach out:

Lifeline: 13 11 14

Suicide call back service: 1300 659 467

Samaritans: 135 247

If in immediate danger: 000

It would be good to note down these events in your mood diary/journal too so you can share it with your MH team.

As for the Mars bar story, did they ever get back to you?

All I got back @tyme was thanks for the story!

Just gotten into bed and prayed that I never wake up. 😥