I can’t cope

Hey @tyme

How are you?

What's happening for you? @Captain24

I've got three kids at my place. My sister and BIL are out. The older two are doing some homework and the little one is playing Rush Hour game. It's a really good game.

Like this https://www.bigw.com.au/product/thinkfun-rush-hour-game/p/9900976291?srsltid=AfmBOoqky5m-iP9PtRNPFvlsddRFH6xy7QZw9MEYwwgYK7lOS-xnnTRh

I’m really struggling today @tyme. It’s not a good day. I called in sick, slept and did self care stuff. I’m feeling ashamed for calling in though. At least I have now had a shower though.

Sounds like a full house but all under control!

How was your day?

Oh! No wonder you were early. I thought you finished earlier. I was wondering why I saw your post at 8:30pm @Captain24

What happened? You don't normally call in sick.

Nah I don’t. I really just couldn’t do it today @tyme. I’m trying to make things easier for myself to get up and get going tomorrow. I’ve had a shower and I have made my lunch. Oddisidian shared a Ted talk on a thread and one of the things was what do you need to make tomorrow easier. So I’m trying that.

I just feel like I have let everyone down and that I’m a failure. I’m really down on myself. Really down.

Let everyone down? @Captain24

Can you put that thought on a leaf and watch it float down the river? Just say goodnight to it.

Or, write it on a sticky note and hurl it across the room 🙂 I did that with a sticky note the other day... lo;. It felt gooood!

I've been doing some studies on mindfulness in therapy plus other things. The growing body of research is so interesting.

You made a wooden marble run?

Oh! I forgot to say that last night, I contacted my mum... just sent her a msg. Her response, "So you remember me?"

I laughed... totally my mum @Captain24

@Captain24 because i lost my voice i could'nt call and also don't feel confident to call myself to follow up. realise how stressful it has been. feel so tired.

the water helps, my gp said hot drinnks as well. i started feeling sick on wednesday suddenly. i tihnk i should be okay to get out and about on monday but i don't want to give it to anyone else

last friday night i went to my friends house and her kids were there and now all of us are sick

i think it was from the kids

I feel like everyone has invested time into me and I keep failing everyone. I should be moving forward not backwards. It doesn’t matter what I try I keep going backwards @tyme thats why I have let everyone down. I listen and I try and I fail.

The whole leaves in a stream doesn’t work for me as I don’t see pictures. Maybe writing it down might though.

Im not a fan of the whole mediation stuff and that kind of mindfulness. Mines more the nature side of things, like hopefully seeing a sunrise on the way to work. I would like to learn more about the other side of mindfulness. Like my kind.

I finished that today. It’s pretty cool.

Im glad you contacted your mum and I love the response!

@Captain24 you're really... tapping into something here I think. Why are your standards for yourself sooooo much higher and harsher than they are for others? Something that could be worth discussing in therapy, for sure!

Also, maybe you do stuff up - so do we all when we learn new skills. You don't expect to be able to ride a bike perfectly on your first, second, or even 10th try. We all need training wheels to help us build up the strength to be doing it by ourselves. Happy to help be your training wheels in this!

Take some deep breaths, remind yourself that you're probably extra sensitive right now (impending surgery will do that), and try again tomorrow.

Aww thanks for sharing your sentimentality!! You're right, things with history and meaning have like...an energy about them - in my experience anyway. This is why I love antiquing! So many stories in old junk.... 😋

Ahahaha....both. I am both rearranging my house, and getting rid of the old stuff. Plus, to get to my house you have to go through a shed, cos I'm in a wee lil rear property. So had to clear that too so they could get the couch round the corner of the doors. Big job, not a lot of time - ADHD cleaning powerhouse-mode engage!! 😂