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Something’s not right

I can’t cope

I can’t cope

Hi. I’m new and have never been in anything like this before.
I’m really struggling with depression at the moment and just need a place to vent.
there is no reason as to why I feel this way. I just hate myself and feel like I’m an unworthy and useless person. I don’t have a partner or many friends. I feel like I keep pushing them away when I’m down. I’m just not worthy of them. I hate life and just wish I would go to sleep and not wake up. I feel so much emotional pain inside but numb at the same time. None of this makes any sense but it just how I feel.

29465 replies

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In response to: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

I have journaled a little bit about it. @tyme. I should write it all down. I might do it tomorrow. It’s a great idea. Thank you. There will be an investigation as it has to be reported to the regulators.

I have made a lot of progress and I am proud of myself. If this is a test I’m really failing.

With the urges, I have resisted. That’s a massive achievement and shows me that I am getting stronger

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Precisely @Captain24 .

That's what I want to point out.

Nowadays, I laugh when I think about it. I remember I asked my clinician, "Is this a test?" He looked more than bewildered and had no idea what I was talking about.

But yes, these little mind games have always gotten me through life. Even now, to coax myself to do something, I 'beat the timer' or something silly like that.

But in a way, it shows I'm a goal oriented person and it works for me.

You might find something different works for you.

But yes, whenever there have been incidents, the first thing I do is write as much as I can down so that I don't forget the details when it comes time for the investigation etc. It takes the stress off.

I look forward to hearing how it goes for you this week, when you contact the OHS person... or whoever you have to contact. Remember to see the doc for an all-clear too.

I'll see you around.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

It just cost me a lot at the vets but at least Pixie has had her vaccination and they have both had paralysis tick medication. Plus I have medication to take away if they get sick.

I have sorted out all my meds to take. I have packed most of my clothes. All I have left is to pack the things that can’t be packed until the day I go.

Im feeling organised. Wednesday will be a busy day though as I have to bath them and clean the whole house plus have a sleep as I’ll be coming off nightshift.

So much to do but I’ve done what I can.

My head is still pounding and I’ve taken so much OTC meds and can’t stop it. There’s nothing else I can take. It’s making me feel miserable. I need it to go ease before I go away. I don’t want to be in the sun all day with the way my head is. But the holiday is on the coast so all I want to do is be in the sun.

Hopefully things come together and it all works out. Fingers crossed.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Hey @Captain24 I've just been catching up on everything. Have you thought any more about seeing the dr? Maybe just having a check before you go away could be a good idea if you're still feeling unwell.

It sounds like you're getting nice and organised for your trip, hopefully that makes it all go nice and smoothly. Keeping my fingers crossed things come together for you too!

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Just popping past and leaving some 💗here for you.

Sounds like you are working through some things at the moment. Hopefully things work out for you.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Thanks @Snowie

There is a lot going on.

I just wish I could get rid of the headache.

Im waiting to find out when the investigation is for my incident. I should ask tonight if I remember. If it’s next week I’ll be away. I’ve never been involved in something so serious. The investigation scares me because I’m going to have to talk in front of all the people that do it.

How are you going being out of hospital?

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Hopefully you find out soon @Captain24 and it can all be solved before you go away. Last things you want to worry about.

Just trying to settle back into things here, hopefully the next few days go ok.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

It’s hard to settle back in @Snowie. I struggled a lot. I understood why they wouldn’t let me out. But now I feel

like I have turned a corner. I’ve taken a couple of backwards steps in the last few days. But I guess that’s understandable.

I hope you find your feet and can also

move forward.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Hi @Captain24

I think it is totally normal to take some steps backwards. I know that I do too. It's also hard to settle back into our normal lives, especially when things are so different when we are in hospital.

I know how you feel.

Hopefully your hospital visit helps you in the long run. Feeling like you have turned a corner is a really good step forward.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Heyo @Captain24 and @Snowie how you both travelling?

Cap I thought of you when I saw this, just in case you didn't see it in the Ice-Memery post I wanted to share it w you here!!

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