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Something’s not right

I can’t cope

I can’t cope

Hi. I’m new and have never been in anything like this before.
I’m really struggling with depression at the moment and just need a place to vent.
there is no reason as to why I feel this way. I just hate myself and feel like I’m an unworthy and useless person. I don’t have a partner or many friends. I feel like I keep pushing them away when I’m down. I’m just not worthy of them. I hate life and just wish I would go to sleep and not wake up. I feel so much emotional pain inside but numb at the same time. None of this makes any sense but it just how I feel.

29366 replies

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In response to: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Wishing you the best @Captain24

Hoping work went ok and things start to improve for you.

Please make sure you look after yourself 💗💗

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Work went ok. @Snowie @creative_writer . I really struggled with trying to stay awake though. plus I had too much going through my head.

I have just spoken to my CM. She didn’t mention ED or an admission so that’s a start. She is extremely concerned though. Especially with not sleeping for the last 2 days. I have agreed to take a prn tonight and tomorrow night to try and get some sleep. Plus if the chest pain keeps reoccurring.

She asked me if I was safe. I hesitated. She didn’t comment.

I have to ring her on Monday. I’m on my own until then. It’s not going to be easy. With having no work and at home for a rainy weekend, I really need help.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Hi @Captain24,

I can hear you're worried about the weekend and being alone, so I thought maybe we could brainstorm things you can do if the thoughts get too overwhelming. How does that sound? ❤️

Preparing a list can be very helpful; sometimes, when we're too distressed, we're unable to develop strategies.

Something on my list is having a warm shower when I feel intense emotions. Is there anything you do that is soothing for you?

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

@Captain24 I am wondering whether you created a safety plan before. I think @lavenderhaze idea on brainstorming ideas sounds like a good idea.

Sitting with you 💖🫂

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

That would be good @lavenderhaze. I do have an extra dog for a couple of hours each day.

I kinda need some things to try and check off. I need some kind of plan.

I need to also try and catch it early, which is hard as I am usually waking is a distressed state.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Aw, do you mean you have Jett and Pix and another one?

It can be hard to catch it early @Captain24 ❤️

That's why writing things down as you notice them can be helpful - I have written down my "warning" signs in my journal - signs that I am getting unwell. When I notice a couple of things happening, I reach out for more support early so things won't get out of control

What would you like to start with for your list of things to do over the weekend? Is walking the dogs something you do every day? Is it helpful?

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Yeah I’ll have mums dog too for a couple of hours @lavenderhaze. Jett and Keiko are best of friends and just run a muck. Pixie joins in sometimes but usually just snuggles with me.

I will try and take all 3 dogs for a walk in the afternoons if mum hasn’t picked her dog up yet.

I should do some Lego and diamond art as I haven’t done them for a while.

I have a safety plan @creative_writer but I find it useless.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Aw that's cute, seems like pixie is on your team hey!

A walk with the dogs sounds really nice 🙂

So do diamond art and Lego

Journaling, aroma therapy, breathing exercises - do you find things like that helpful? @Captain24

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Re: I can’t cope

Yep.. Pix is definitely team mum! When the other two a tearing around the house, every time they come near her she growls at them and then comes over to me! @lavenderhaze

I’m not big into journaling but it might be worth a go so I can share it with my CM on Tuesday and maybe being able to share what I am feeling in the moment may help with clarity.

I have too many allergies for aromatherapy but I do have a nice fruity scented candle that I burn when I have a bath or clean the house.

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