Topic Tuesday // Pride Month: Connection and Growth // Tues 28th June, 2022 7-8:30PM AEST

Hi there @petrichor 😊You haven't missed much at all! Feel free to stick around if you'd like to

Hello @petrichor welcome 🤗

@Clawde I can really hear that being with community is so important to you ❤️ You have so much wisdom and have gone through so much. And yes, I agree, we are still oppressed, but I wonder how we can create a positive vision for the future of our community?

What positive changes have you seen for our community over your time?

Sending a big virtual hug ❤️

@Clawde I genuinely understand how it feels like we'll always be treated differently.

It makes me think of what Angela Davis says in this amazing video, though - on the value of hope to motivate our collective action- without this hope, a better future would never be possible 🌈

Thank you @Former-Member for your press of the support button, thought I was being shunned out a little used to that in this ………life time.

Next question for tonight 🙂

The LGBTQIA+ community as a whole and as individuals have experienced a lot of trauma.

@Former-Member, how have you navigated this during your own recovery?

For LGBTIAQ+ community reading along: How have you navigated through community trauma in your own recovery and stayed safe?

For allies reading along: Were you aware about how much collective trauma there is in the LGBTIAQ+ community? Does knowing this make you reflect on anything you could do differently in the future with regards to supporting LGBTIAQ+ people?

I can completely understand where those feelings may have come from @Clawde given everything you have experienced. I just want to say that you are welcome here ❤️

This is such an important question! Lots of LGBTQIA+ people have experienced a great amount of trauma. Both on the collective level (eg. Our sexual orientation being illegal until recent times, or attacked in the media during the Marriage Equality plebiscite) but also an individual level (eg. Being estranged from family, rejected my friends and workplaces). This trauma has an enormous impact on all of us.

In my experience, this means a lot of community events centre on partying and excessive drinking. For me, this was initially the only context I felt I could express myself. And while many of us can engage in these activities in a healthy way, that’s not the case for everyone.

For me, it was initially the only way I knew how to engage with other LGBTQIA+ people. But I slowly started to realise that it wasn’t helping my recovery journey.

I don’t know if anyone has watched Hannah Gadsby’s Nanette comedy special? She calls herself a “quiet gay”. That’s what I realised I was. I was a queer person who wanted to sit around and knit, drink cups of tea.

So instead, I expressed this to some friends and we thought of ways to gain that sense of belonging without the harmful partying. So we

• Wanted to identify how trauma shaped us, address that and share our learnings with others
• Had a specific group chat to talk about and problem solve our crappy experiences
• We started “wholesome” activities together like queer birdwatching (my new favourite thing) or a movie night together
• We would be sober buddies at the big parties so we felt less out of place
• I’m planning on attending a queer knitting circle soon!

It took me a while, but I’ve built up a few friends who are queer and we catch up outside of drinking! And while I still occasionally attend big parties, it’s no longer central to my identity as a queer person.

Not at all @Clawde, I can completely empathise with what you posted, it really resonated with me. You are definitely not alone in ever feeling that way. 💜

The community still has a long way to go with feeling safe.

@Former-Member, what does safety feel like for you? And how has this helped your own recovery?

For LGBTQ+ community reading along: What does safety feel like for you? What are some small ways you seek out safety when you feel unsafe?

For allies reading along: What are some ways you can make LGBTIAQ+ people around you feel more safe?