Hi @Meatloaf
I just wanted to reach out and welcome you to the forums - it’s great to have you here 😊
I’m so deeply sorry to hear that you’ve been experiencing terrible flashbacks to traumatic experiences that occurred during your childhood and my heart goes out to you 💜
Oh Meatloaf 💜 Given everything that’s happened to you, it’s completely understandable that you’ve been weepy and anxious and that you feel powerless and isolated 💜
In my experience, living with trauma feels like an ongoing battle, where I’m desperately trying to fight the chaos in my mind and escape the torment of my thoughts and feelings.
Given the complexities associated with living with trauma, I just wanted to say that I think that you were incredibly resourceful and courageous to reach out to 1800 Respect and I’m so sorry to hear that they weren’t able to support you in the way that you needed 💜
As I listened to this part of your story, I ever so gently wondered if an organisation called Blue Knot may be helpful for you.
Basically, Blue Knot provides support for adults who have experienced childhood trauma and abuse.
One of the ways that they provide support is through the Blue Knot Helpline 💜 This particular Helpline is staffed by specialist trauma counsellors who provide short term counselling support, information and referrals for people who are looking for ongoing support.
In addition to the above, they also provide a wealth of resources and information in relation to topics such as understanding trauma and abuse, self-care and coping strategies.
I’ve contacted the Helpline on several occasions and I’ve always had a really positive experiences, where I felt listened to, validated and supported 💜
If this is something that you feel may be helpful for you, you can contact the Helpline on: 1300 657 380.
They operate Monday to Sunday (including public holidays) from 9.00am until 5.00pm AEST.
You can also email them at: helpline@blueknot.org.au
I’ve just provided the link to their website below in case you would like to explore this further:
https://blueknot.org.au/
As I sat here thinking about the part of your story that you shared with us, I wondered if one of our special events known as Topic Tuesday may also be helpful for you 💜
Basically, Topic Tuesday is a live online discussion that’s facilitated by a guest speaker who has expertise in the topic that’s being discussed.
Earlier last year, our Topic Tuesday focused on trauma and recovery and as such, the conversations were guided by a guest speaker from Blue knot 💜
During this time, our Community Manager and our guest speaker created a safe and respectful space whereby they gently invited us to share some of our experiences in relation to trauma.
Although this particular event was held in February of last year, I just ever so gently wondered if you may like to read through the conversations and the information provided by our guest speaker.
I’ve included the link to this event below, just in case this is something that you would like to explore further:
https://saneforums.org/t5/Special-Events/Topic-Tuesday-Trauma-and-Recovery-Blue-Knot-Foundation-Tues-23rd/m-p/1008096#M10473
I’m so sorry to hear about what happened for you during your appointment with your Psychologist and I just wanted to acknowledge the courage that it takes to continue to search for the care and support that you need and deserve after such a distressing experience 💜
Although it was a few years ago now, I can still remember trawling through countless websites trying to find a Therapist and I felt at a complete loss in terms of how to find the ‘right’ person to support me.
Often when I did find someone, I waited weeks and sometimes months for an appointment, only to have such a terrible experience, that I left feeling even more distressed and disillusioned than when I arrived.
It was around this time that I decided to change my approach and as such, I began to ‘interview’ prospective Therapists before I scheduled an appointment to see them 😊
As such, I found one or two people who I felt may be a good fit for me and then I emailed them to ask if it would be possible to schedule a short telephone appointment so that I could ask them a few questions.
To my surprise, everyone that I contacted was more than happy to talk with me for ten minutes or so, free of charge 😊
During my ‘interview’ I asked a variety of questions so that I could get a sense about their professional background, their experience supporting people with the issues that I needed support with, as well as a little about their therapeutic approach and how they would support me.
As such, I felt slightly more powerful and in control of my care, as not only was I advocating for myself in terms of my needs, but I was also asserting and establishing some boundaries in terms of what felt comfortable for me and if something didn’t feel right, I thanked people for their time and I continued my search 😊
With this in mind, I just ever so gently wondered if ‘interviewing’ a potential Therapist may be something that would be helpful for you too?
Sometimes it can be tricky to think about the questions that may be helpful to ask and so I’ve just shared some information from the Blue Knot website that focuses specifically on ‘choosing a counsellor’ in case this is helpful for you:
https://blueknot.org.au/survivors/finding-support/choosing-a-counsellor/
Also, just while I remember, one of the things that really helped me when I was new to the forums and still finding my way around, was that if you would like to chat with another forum member, or reply to one of their posts, place @ in front of their username just like I did at the start of my post to you i.e. @Meatloaf that way, they will receive a message that you have contacted them 😊
Please remember that you’re always welcome to reach out here whenever you need to 💜
Take kind and gentle care of yourself,
ShiningStar 💜