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Something’s not right

Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

I’ve been being treated for OCD and anxiety. This has included undergoing CBT.

Through this process the following has been identified:

- I expect people to be “unreliable”

- I am terrified of making myself vulnerable (there’s precedent as to why)

- I don’t really connect with people

- I feel alone all the time

Noting the heady mix outlined above, I’m now faced with decision of whether I want to change. At the moment I’m just prepared to be “mindful”. Not even sure how I would change even if I wanted to. Jury’s out.

does anyone have any thoughts?

4 replies

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In response to: Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

Re: Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

Hi @Delicatessen

I'm impressed by your knowledge and understanding of self.

I'm not sure if I could have same clarity of self. I have moments....!!

It sounds like the work you are doing is providing some answers, although possibly difficult to navigate.

Only my thoughts- initial interpretation;

I like where you are at i.e prepared to be mindful.

Decisions = choice. This feels like good place to be. Can you sit here for a while? Do you need to make decision right away?

As I said, only my opinion, thoughts.

Kind regards,

Maddison 🧚‍♀️

In response to: Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

Re: Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

Morning @Delicatessen,

I think being mindful is the perfect way to approach it. If you decide you want to take steps towards change, being mindful of what arises for you around that is a sensible way to begin. If in the process of being mindful you discover that you're comfortable sitting where you are, then perhaps that's okay too, and at the very least something you could discuss with your professional supports.

Hope that helps 😊

In response to: Re: Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

Re: Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

Hi @Former-Member @and @maddison

Thank you for your words of encouragement. I’m still definitely in mindfulness mode. I think the realisation itself is still with me. Am definitely not doing some sort of performance review of myself to find answers for way forward.

Some of the fallout from the “heady mix” is that sometimes I’ve found myself in a happy and caring relationship. Then one day, without warning, I will just feel different. Disconnected. Aloof. Affection removed. As though a barrier has been put up that I can see through (so I can still have contact but from a distance). The distancing is emotional, psychological and physical - and completely automatic. Most of these relationships have not survived.

In response to: Re: Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

Re: Just officially diagnosed as being perpetually “alone”

@Delicatessen hey there

My thoughts..

I identify with all the points u wrote about yourself and struggle in relationships

It is hard to change completely our relationship style, but I guess if we are aware of it, we can improve maybe?

I get that u want to have more long lasting meaningful relationships

It is something I find tricky too.

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