@tyme wrote:
I've got a question.
Do you have other strategies that help you get through the day? Do you find lists helpful or more stressful?
Learning to unmask is something that may take time but has ultimately been suuuuper helpful for me! Unmasking is sorta like... diving into and recognising all of the habits, coping mechanisms and other defences you've built up over the years to try to 'fit in' - a.k.a. your mask - and choosing whether or not those things are serving you or not.
So for example, I find that it is really helpful to say things out loud if I want to have a better chance at remembering them. My working memory is already at a disadvantage, so giving it an auditory memory as well is really helpful. So much so that sometimes I'll just end up talking to myself as I'm walking around my house. But it's like I'm just constantly giving myself a pep talk hehe
"Okay Jynx, you know you got up for a reason, what was it?"
"Bins bins bins don't forget the bins!"
"The confirmation code was 1234 don't forget 1234"
Also, I allow myself to fidget wayyyy more, and well, a big part of unmasking for me has been fully embracing my chaotic, energetic approach to social situations. I used to get mega anxiety, but am now a lot more comfortable being super passionate about my current hyperfocus, for anyone who will listen. And since I'm very open about my neurodiversity, people know from the get go what to expect from me. If they find me too overwhelming, that's fine, they can put their boundaries into place and step away. But I refuse to dull my shine for anyone else! REFUSE! 😄
Tips and tricks... hmm well I set like a million alarms! They remind me of all the stuff I would otherwise forget. Plus having multiple alarms helps me be on time - one to wake me, one to actually get me out of bed and stop me playing chicken with the snooze button, and then one to tell me when I have 5 minutes left to leave the house. That last one is essential, because I often get caught up in stuff and don't realise how much time is passing.
Lists are both helpful and not... like I never have one big master 'to-do' list because it easily overwhelms me! Plus, I often find myself pointedly ignoring them. I try to keep a diary (but have to set an alarm to remind me to actually use it lol) so that I don't double-book myself, and will only make to-do lists for like, specific days (e.g. if I'm going away, I'll make a list for the few days before to help me ensure I've packed everything and sorted everything out at home, like not leaving leftovers in the fridge to go bad). You gotta find what works for you!