Topic Tuesday // ADHD // Tuesday 22nd February, 7:00- 8:30PM AEDT

Thanks for the recommendation @Teej !! Awesome 💜

@Shaz51 haha that sounds familiar! I do it with cleaning too - will get halfway through folding the laundry and get distracted, only to have it sit there for another three days 😅

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@Paperdaisy wrote:

Question 5: What are some of the main challenges you face?

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Where to start? Because we exist in a world built by and for neurotypical brains, many aspects of daily life can be quite challenging. Making and keeping appointments, planning and scheduling, filling out forms (and basically all bureaucracy), remembering plans with friends, having the willpower to keep a diary to help organise my life, tidying up my house, paying bills on time, remembering to pay rent…

Plus also having trouble in building and maintaining social connections. This is due to a number of things, like time blindness (forgetting birthdays, being late to dates or catch ups, etc), being seen as rude for interrupting (if I don’t say this thing I’ll forget it, and so I must say it now or I will EXPLODE), or struggling with the ‘object permanence’ concept in relationships. I may literally forget about the existence of someone I care about – not because I no longer care about them, but because of the difficulties in memory and recall. Thus, I may not contact them for months or even years, leaving them to assume I no longer care about them, despite this being far from the truth.

If anyone is interested here is a link to that podcast, but note not everyone will like it. I think you’ll have to search to find the explanation of the links to adhd.
https://www.drummerandthegreatmountain.com/adult-adhd-add-podcast

@Paperdaisy , @Jynx

Ha ha @Jynx and having 4 in the house

My step D 1 had every lights in the house on while cooking scones at 10pm one night 🤣😂🥰❤

@Jynx , all the challenges you wrote down

I do that all for the family

@Jynx I find that object permance tricky in so many ways with people!

I struggle to maintain friendships cos I forget people exist

which goes also for relationships

I forget that people have died - and then I remember and its as fresh as the day it happened. My Nan died 6 years ago and I am still reduced to tears when I remember that.

Question 6: What are some tips or strategies for a) managing your ADHD and b) for friends or loved ones to know?

Automation! it is the only way my bills are paid, my house gets vacuumed, we have enough food in the house

For me the challenges are numerous because of the masking and avoiding being seen for decades. I don’t want to go in to it all but basically I’ve never really managed life but I’ve pretended otherwise. I have not worked for 27 years because of my avoidance and masking to the extreme. I am still petrified of being seen for who I am. I still struggle with feeling lazy and hopeless. For me personally my adhd causes suicide ideation lots about feeling different. The psychiatrist that I see has been amazing and supportive and she gives me hope that I can manage it better.

@Bristle it's a real tough one hey. And it can be hard to have grief hit you so hard, unexpectedly - especially if others have the expectation of you that you ought to be 'over it' by now.

Hugs, that is so tough. 💜