ThePastNew Contributor
Confronting the past
Hi .... I’m The Past
A few weeks ago I had a trigger moment and I blew up at my Father the worst I have ever done. I have spent the time since reflecting why .... I know why but he doesn’t and I am finally going to change that. So it’s arranged .... and I feel sick.
Next weekend ... AKA 6 days away I plan/hope to confront my father with demons from the past. He knows somethings coming but I suspect I will catch him off guard.
I know he had a glimpse at my demon once, but he never asked me again. I was just a little kid. I suspect he was a coward. I spent the next few years growing up without him even though he was still in the house. When I started high-school he left mum and moved out ........
Fast forward another 30 or 40 years and on the surface there are bandaids. I know I’m blessed, lucky, fortunate, successful with a great wife (30 years this year) and 4 👍👍👍👍 kids.
But deep down inside ..... 😖🌪🤬💔 my heart is doing 110 just typing this post
I can’t keep pretending he never met my demon and I can’t keep pretending I don’t know the truth about why he left.
I feel in total charge of the situation and I’m Lost and shaking n a dark place
6 days
🤷♂️