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Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

I was raped a little over 20 years ago now. It was by someone I knew and trusted and it occurred in my own home. I was physically injured, concussed, ashamed, afraid, embarrassed - all the usual things.

I never reported it to the authorities and never spoke to anyone about it. I had never been a particularly social person, but afterwards I isolated myself completely other than heading off to work dutifully each day.

After 18 years of almost constant battles with anxiety, flashbacks, nightmares, triggers, etc, I finally sought help from a psychologist. Initially it was for pain management as I suffered a severe back injury about 2 years after the rape. So after almost 2 years of occasional appointments I finally told her during a particularly difficult time (anniversary) what had happened all those years ago.

So early last year I was officially diagnosed with PTSD. On my clinical psychologists advice I have undergone a series of Exposure Therapy and CBT last year. It was a long, arduous and extremely difficult process. However, it did help to some degree.

However the nightmares, anxiety symptoms, etc continued. This was probably made worse as last year was an extremely difficult one for me all round. My little 11yo niece was killed in a car accident, my brother seriously and permanently injured, I was retrenched from my job when the business was sold, and I found out that my husband was cheating on me again. So I guess none of that helped.

And then on 29th February this year it was the 20th anniversary of my trauma. It seemed to hit me even harder than usual, I dont know why. There just seemed to be triggering events around every corner, it was awful. I struggled very badly.

My psychologist decided to try EMDR treatment once things settled down a bit. She felt it would help with the emotional content of my traumatic memories. So between April and early September this year, I have undergone 10 2xhour EMDR sessions. I am now on a break to see how things are now.

But in the meantime she wants me to talk to people about what happened, as it is an important part of the recovery process she says. However I find this really hard as I do not have any friends (my hubby is a narsissist according to my psychologist). I have become very isolated other than for my part-time work which I was lucky enough to find in January. I do some volunteer work in the aged care industry, which I enjoy. But I just do not have any friends I am able to talk to. My family live a long way away, and I could never tell them anyway.

Although I am still unable to verbally speak about the rape, I can now write about it, and even think about it to some extent, without bringing on a panic attack. So that's progress. I hope that by discussing it further and by learning how other people cope with their PTSD symptoms, I can further desensitise myself from my traumatic memories.

Hence my decision to try an online forum. I look forward to responses from other people who have had similar experiences to myself. I am definitely more of a listener than a talker, so I hope that I may be able to be of assistance to others here as well.

Thankyou for taking the time to read my story.

2344 replies

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In response to: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Dear @Former-Member

a few days have passed since your post and I do hope you are not still feeling so bad. What you describe sounds awful indeed. I am glad your clin psych is so caring, even if she can’t “do” anything, being present to talk to is important. I dare say February is a bad month and you will be glad when it has passed.

Is it hot where you are? It is not too bad here but warms up in the afternoon. I wish I could think of something wise to say, but I can’t. But I am thinking of you and wishing you good things.

Peri

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hi everyone @Zoe7 @outlander @Maggie @BlueBay @Former-Member @Sam3 @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @Starta @Peri and any others I may have missed.

Thanks everyone for your advise and support. And also for your reassurances that my reactions to this stupid test last Wednesday were not completely idiotic. My psych kindly pointed out to me that most people with a history of rape or sexual abuse avoid the test entirely, as it re-traumatises them too badly. So I guess I'm not doing too badly after all. At least I tried? And silly me .... I intend to try again. 😨

My psych appointment is tomorrow morning and, quite frankly, I'm dreading it. Since Friday when I last posted here, I am a little less emotional and triggered, so thats a fair start. But I have been getting the worst dreams! Not what I'd call nightmares or flashbacks thankfully, because I dont wake up not knowing where I am and struggling to breathe, nor do I feel like I'm reliving things. But these bad dreams are very much related to my trauma and are not at all nice. Just not as extreme or painful as what they often get. Perhaps the medication I started on the weekend has deadened the impact of what would normally be full scale nightmares? If so, then I am thankful I guess. It is enabling me to get a few hours sleep most nights. I can manage on that, and often do.

Thanks @Peri for reminding me that I have not posted here in a while. And yes, February is traditionally a very difficult time for me. Thankfully its a short month aye? Its quite hot here, but not as bad as it had been the previous 2 weeks. And we even had 2 days over the weekend where it was below 30C. Nice! But I think for the next week, it will be around 30C or a little over. I can handle that. Certainly much better than the 38C temps we got for most of the week before. Oh Peri ... you dont have to think of anything particularly wise to say. Just you being here and letting me know you are still around and care, is quite enough. Thank you. 🌸 How are you doing anyway, since you returned from Melbourne? I will try to get to your thread again soon. I think I posted only a few days ago? I will have to check.

So everyone ... I dont really feel much like talking, so I have been a little quiet I guess, as Peri rightly pointed out. So my apologies for not responding to your posts sooner. I most certainly read all of your posts however, and greatly appreciate them all. I will let you know how I go at my psych tomorrow. I think we are to discuss a 'plan of action' for Friday 15th.

Sherry 💕

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hi @Former-Member good luck with your appt tomorrow. Don’t worry about not responding to others. I totally understand. Take care ❤️❤️

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

you are trying your very best @Former-Member

good luck with your psych appt tomorrow, its ok to dread it but i hope she is kind and helpful. Is there soemthing in particular that your dreading about it? happy to talk if you need to.

im sorry your having horrible dreams, they are so draining.
big hugs, sitting with you always

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

good luck with your appt tomorrow. @Former-Member , will be thinking of you xxxxxx

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hello @Former-Member @Shaz51 @outlander @BlueBay special hello to @Peri as I don’t think we’ve met.

@Former-Member I hope it’s ok to say that I mentioned to a friend just an hour ago how brave & impressive your approach was to that Pap smear (& to the follow-up). Then I saw your post below!

Mall the best for the psych appointment & getting a “plan in place” for the 15th @Former-Member

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Good luck at your appt today @Former-Member ❤

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Thanks everyone @BlueBay @outlander @Shaz51 @Sam3 for your responses yesterday. And also for those who gave a thumbs up instead @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope and a few others who usually do @Zoe7 @Peri @Starta

I saw my clinical psych today as planned, and as expected she wanted to go over what took place last week and what we can do to make it easier next time. She will write to my GP and request a stronger anti-anxiety for prior to the procedure. The one I took last week did nothing, but when I asked him about something last time, he was reluctant to give me anything stronger. Will see how we go with some explanation from my psych. She said he has to understand the difference between a bit of mild anxiety which many people may experience, and the affect that trauma has on us. So I will have to wait to see what response she gets back from him before we make further plans.

She also asked my permission to phone and talk to the people at the hospital who I have the next appointment with. Just to give them a bit of a heads up on things. The reason being that if I am asked ... I simply go mute and cry, unable to explain my stupid reactions to anyone. So that should be helpful too, irrespective of the outcome of her request for additional sedation.

Once again she offered to pick me up, stay with me and drop me home if I do use sedation of any sort. I said I could not allow her to do that because she has appointments etc. But she said she could rearrange them. So it was really nice of her to offer. But I said I would wait and see first about what happens with the meds, as I may not need to be driven anyway. If I need to be driven I will try to get a neighbour to drop me into town, as I know he goes into town most Fridays anyway. So thats a possibility. Then I could get a taxi home. Expensive option ... but I'd rather that than to impose on my psych any more than I already have done. She bulk billed me today too, which was knd of her, and I was very appreciative.

So now I just wait and see. My psych said if things dont all fall neatly into place, then her advice would be to push next weeks appt forward a little. I just want it over and done with.

I'm still feeling really jittery, shaky ... but thankfully I'm no longer bursting into tears at the drop of a hat! Sleep remains elusive, but I think the medication I started taking on the weekend for ptsd-related nighmares ... is helping a little in that regard. My psych was happy to hear that I started on it as she suggested I should. I'm still so tired though ... always tired ... go to bed tired, get up tired, tired all day ... both body and mind. Just tired.

I will try to catch up with most of you on your threads over the coming couple of days. Although tomorrow is a busy day with 2 apts in town for hubby in the morning. Another one for him on Saturday. Friday is a day off ... yay! But then next week is a biggie - for both hubby and me.

Sherry 🌸⭐💕

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

It sounds as though your psych is being her super supportive self @Former-Member and despite you not taking up her offer you still have that option there. It will be great that she communicates with your gp and the hospital so this all goes as smoothly as it possibly can for you. Nothing will take away how you feel about it all but having all these things in place will hopefully help those caring for you.

I hope the upcoming appointments for you and hubby go okay.

Sorry not very talkative this afternoon but listening and sending you love and hugs

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hello @Former-Member ,

I have reading and keeping up to date with you, I’m very pleased that you are getting some good caring support from your mental health team, they seem really caring...

Im sorry your not sleeping really well...Sleeping is so important for our way to wellness with our mh...Donyou do Mindfulness before bed...

I wonder if you can write your fears and negative thoughts down on a piece of paper to release it from your mind...

When you write, it’s not just a simple writing, you are eliminating these thoughts from your mindset, and it helps in getting rid of your negativity.

When you are surrounded by negative thoughts,, try to find a way to understand the reason of these thoughts. Try to find some positives hiding in you negatives. This is the best way of changing the negativies going on in your mind to positives.

Anxiety and depression are like other emotions that we feel them for a reason. But understanding why it happens is important...

I listen to music a lot now when I need calming. Usually something catchy that makes you want to sing along with, it helps to take away our sadness and stops our negative thoughts,,,our mind can only have one thought at a time, if your listening and singing along with the song that’s all your mind can think off....

I understand February is a very hard month for you, as March is for me...Deep breath when you need to sweety...talk here if you feel up to it...

Thinking of you dear friend,

love and hugs..💜💜🤗🤗🤗...and a rainbow for hope 🌈...peace 🕊..and new beginnings 🌱

Starta

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