Henry's Landing Strip & Hangar

@Anastasia

Dear @HenryX

Thanks but it is still complicated. I let it go ... have sung and conducted a Leunig version and endeavoured to practise it. Yet it comes charging at me again. I shared for fullness. There was been a little too much arm's length in the family. I was taken out of the equation while I was doing all the work for her half sister. It made for a very unnatural family dynamic. The mother but not the mother. I did not mean to place myself as centre, but being in that position for 16 years had very damaging impact, for me and my boy, and my girl, and am in major current tricky situation with my son.

A new friend has just phoned being encouraging about my son and to me to keep the strength. First good words I have heard, and healing.

Thank you

Apple

@Appleblossom 💛💙

Hello @Appleblossom

Thank you for responding to what was said in my previous post. I do hear what you are saying and I am also listening. It is very difficult to support others when there appear to be tendencies toward fragmentation, as appears to be the case in your situation. Also, I am conscious of and aware, that any other person's observations, such as my own, cannot take into account the factors involved and what another person, validly, wishes to achieve or contribute in their own environment, family, social, community or occupational space.

That gives me all the more reason to be appreciative of your care to respond.

With My Very Best Wishes

@HenryX

Good Evening @Anastasia , @Appleblossom , @Emelia8 , @Mumi , @Clawde , @1stepup61

and other visitors to this thread

Another distraction or diversion that may be more “up in the hair” than “up in the air” is the following Youtube clip that I found interesting:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwNLXeCVVXo&ab_channel=SnappyDragon

It is a reflection on the differences between past and present ways of dealing with issues of cleanliness, in particular with regard to hair, for this one.

I'd be interested to know your thoughts about this idea or possible variations. And if you see any other ideas, that may be interesting for others also, please present them here on this thread

With Best Wishes,

@HenryX

The hair vid was another good distraction. @HenryX

Neighbourly chats have touched on hair recently.

One lady mad on vaxxes and clean clean clean is proud of making 2 visits to hairdressers to make up for missing out in lockdown. I am not that sympathetic about "poor me, no hairdresser", as I have done my own hair most of life. 2 doors down the anti vax guy was telling me has stopped using shampoo and his hair is clean. He actually specifies that he is pro freedom, which are the new It takes all types in a crazy world. I am somewhere between them, and yes am pretty over excess personal care products. Trying to encourage people to appreciate the goodness in dirt ... it helps grows good things too. Another spectrum where we need to find balance, as you seem aware of with your measured long posts.

The level of fragmentation in my family was serious going back generations now with 2 generations, including me, spending time in "out of home" care. Then the shame of all that and the life and death consequences have rolling effects. Their shame was more important than anything that happened to me or sibs. Feuds between 'sisters who had a rich hubby and a dead one' meant all the other successful ones kept their noses down and forgot any compassionate sensibilities for the poor rellies.

I have an aunt who said 'what goes around comes around' too much, and when I made a statement once she did not like it, but I had felt silenced too often, and see it tossed around from positions of power. I used listening skills not talking ones. I am better at typing than talking. lol ... and finally feel a bit heard, and tbh it was part of my impetus to keep posting on the forum. I need to put 'this' on the airwaves ... kind of thing ....

I am also nerdy enough to look at it from a non personal approach and have to raise the issue that in fragmented systems "normal" feedback loops are broken. That happened within family relationships and also within state service relationships, which were all a bit jumbled up in my life. Not a clear distinction between public. private, state, family, or even church, and social. I am not deliberately making things complicated its just that they were. 12 schools before secondary, but at least school had some logic I could discern, most other things that happened did not.

Hello @Appleblossom

Glad the hair vid appealed to you and was a good distraction.

Also pleased that you took the opportunity to express some of your thoughts and feelings about your history and present. It is apparent that you have now, and have had in your life, a huge range of inputs, influences, personalities and many more variables, I believe, than most people have to contend with and still try to make sense of in their lives.

Especially knowing what you have previously stated in other posts and threads as well as this thread, I am often struck by what appears to me to be your drive, balance, focus and care for others; attributes that definitely come through to me from your comments.

I enjoy corresponding with you @Appleblossom . Thank you.

With My Very Best Wishes

@HenryX

Hello @Anastasia

It took a while for the image, that you had offered to @Appleblossom yesterday, to come through forum "quarantine". It was only later in the afternoon that I was going back through various posts that I thought, "Ohhh, where did this image come from?". However, my surprise added to my appreciation of the image that you presented. The colour, form, flow and apparent ease of the subject, in what I viewed as a meditational pose, were aspects that appealed to me.

Thanks, @Anastasia

With Best Wishes

@HenryX

Thanks@HenryX

Yes, most people, past, present and future have struggles and challenges.

Ensor Skeletons - At the hearth

I think I'm going into detox. I'm so scared

Are you still in hospital @Former-Member ? And is detox an inpatient thing?

Can I ask what scares you about detox? Hopefully you will have whatever support you are likely to need. Try to see it as something positive. Life will be easier for you as a result, I would expect.