Topic Tuesday // Body Image and Eating Disorders // Tues 28th September, 7:00-8:30PM AEST

What has your recovery journey looked like for you?

My recovery journey started as soon as I found the dietitian – I learnt a lot from her. She helped me come to terms with what I was experiencing, let me know that I definitely wasn’t alone and that recovery was possible.

For me, the most important thing was engaging with other people who were experiencing or had experienced an eating disorder as I didn’t know anyone else who had. My dietitian referred me to a group therapy program which was absolutely life-changing. Being able to share my experiences in a group environment and hear from others was very empowering. Not only was the shared experience helpful but I also learnt new strategies and tools that were eating disorder-specific.

I also started using social media as a tool for good. Instead of following people who made me feel awful about my body (talking about diets, weight loss etc), I started following body positive accounts and have found a whole community online.

I had a bit of a setback in recovery last year during our second lockdown. It was a tough year, the pandemic caused me some anxiety, I’d also lost most of my work and income and found myself withdrawing and becoming depressed. I noticed that I was turning to food again as a way to cope and although emotional eating is a normal response sometimes, I was concerned it would turn into regular bingeing, so I connected with a new psychologist and she helped me work through the rough patch.

I still have the occasional ‘bad’ body image day, but they certainly aren’t as extreme as before. I’ve found acceptance in myself and my body. I know that my worth is not linked to what my body looks like or how much the number on the scale says.

If you could speak to yourself at the start of your recovery journey, knowing what you know now, what would be your top three messages to yourself?

1. Life is too short to be spending it loathing your body. How do you want to look back on life when you’re 80 years old? Regret that you didn’t eat that cake to celebrate a special birthday, or that you missed out on swimming in the crystal-clear sea because you didn’t want to be seen in a swimsuit, or that you spent most of the time at the gym?

2. Your weight does not determine your worth. We are all worthy of respect and kindness regardless of what shape or size our body is.

3. Recovery is possible. It is possible to have a healthy relationship with your body and with food again!

That's amazing @SarahBee . I really appreciate you sharing your journey with us.

I think it's also important to note that recovery doesn't mean you'll never have a 'bad' day again.

Your post certainly humanises the mental health condition and tells us what it is really like.

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@BlueBay wrote:

I think it's very hard for me to be kind to myself. To have self love for my body. Because I don't 😪

@SarahBee @Daisydreamer

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That sounds like a really painful space to sit in @BlueBay, feeling like you don't have self love for your body right now It is a journey, and it's okay to be where you are at with your relationship with your body. The fact that you can say that you aren't there yet is a good step, and I hope that right now while you aren't feeling that love, that you have support and kindness around you. No matter where you are at in the journey, you will always here people here to sit with you

Hi @chibam , your experience with your therapist refusing to disclose the side effects of your medication must been so challenging and scary. We should definitely have the right to make an informed choice about the medication we're taking!

Thank you @Daisydreamer 😪😪

im sorry it's too much for me. I think I'll go.

That must be so challenging @Millieme ! Sounds like services are scarce in your area. Has Telehealth opened up opportunities for you to seek the support you need?

Is it an eating disorder if you can only stand the taste of a small range of foods? Like, if the taste of most foods makes you feel physically ill?

I have huge social problems with food because there's a very limited amount of foods I can stand to eat - purely because of the taste (i.e. nothing to do with weight or appearance); and that creates enormous problems for me because it makes me very visably unusual in social situations involving food. If you ask me over for dinner, I'll almost certainly hate what you are serving up.

I just wish there was somewhere I could go where food doesn't exist; a place that doesn't have an "eating culture". A place where I could go to have social bonds without anyone shoving food under my face that's going to make me want to throw up.