Panic Attacks

Hi everyone, I am butterfly girl. I have had panic attacks on and off throughout my whole life. They have always been for a reason though. If there wasn't a toilet near by or if I was in a group interview for a job, or if I was in a crowded place.

Last Wendesnday my taste buds on my tounge swelled up and so did my tounge. I thought I was going to swallow my tounge or suffocate. I thought it was because of these vitamins I had taken that day. I took b1 and b12. The next day I felt jittery again. I called into work and said I couldn't come, and that I would come in the next day instead. I thought since I had been eating vegan for the last month that it may have been contributing to the jittery feelings so I ate meat that night.

The next day I went into work like usual. It was very hot in there. I felt like I was suffocating. I started shaking and I had to run to the toilet. My heart was beating out of my chest. I thought I was going to vomit and feint in front of everyone. I only lasted half an hour before I couldn't take it anymore and I had to leave. I was shaking so much I tried to pick up my bag but I dropped it loudly on the ground.

I drove myself straight to the doctors. I sat in there for about 5 minutes but then I had to leave. I went home and listened to a guided meditation on my phone. I felt euphoric, and my heart would not stop beating. I had a cold shower but my heart would not stop beating. I managed to sleep for half and hour. I tried to go to the doctors again but i coudln't stay there.

I have never had a panic attack that had lasted for so long. I was also thinking to myself the whole time that I was going to die. That I was never going to snap out of it, and that my boyfriend was going to come home and have to put me in a mental institution.

I called a home doctor that night and they gave me some relaxing medication. I only took half because pills effect me quite badly.

I also stopped taking the b vitamins because I found online that they can cause panic attacks.

It may also be because I have a marina/iud. I plan to have it taken out, encase it is the reason.

Also each day I am meditating, writing what I am greatful for each morning and night. Writing pages and pages in my journal, I am having fresh juice everyday, I am having NO coffee and plenty of camomile tea. I am having plenty of drops of rescue remedy. I am walking my dog everyday. I am staying communicative with my family. I am following the guidance of a coaching course I am taking online, and taking my medication in quaters when I feel too overwhelmed. I am listening to guided meditations, sniffing lavender oil, body brushing, putting lavender oil on my temples, drinking plenty of water and staying away from any stressful news or situations. I am also listening to subliminal messaging for anxiety on my phone.

The most helpful app I found was an app called "panic attacks" which implements strategies (which I have written down and I keep in my bag for when I have to leave the house) as well as a guided relaxation audio. I would highly recommend this app! It helped me understand what my body is going during a panic attack, and that I am NOT going crazy!

Today I managed to go to the doctors with the help of my boyfriend. I am booked in to see a mental health nurse 2moro, which will be another challenge but I believe I can do it! I also went to the shops and to the car wash today, which is a big win! I am hoping I will be able to go back to school, work and family events soon! But then again I am not thinking too much about the future.

Panic attacks have alowed me to stay in the present otherwise I start freaking out again.

I am also letting myself sleep as much as my body wants and needs. Panic attacks can really wear your body out so let it recover.

I hope this helps anyone reading, and thank you for letting me share

Lots of love, butterfly girl.