FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Something’s not right

Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

I ended the relationship I was in 9 days ago. When I came to the knowledge that my ex had been emotionally cheating on me for six weeks, the betrayal was too much and I ended the relationship. I don't have any desire to get back with her or work on repairing the relationship I was in. For me trust can never be restored.

I have organised therapy to try deal with what I have been through, but need to wait a bit because therapist is pretty booked up. My feelings and emotions are so mixed. I'm pretty much everywhere emotionally. Angry, sad, in pain, devastated, I try not to think about it. Because the experience of this happening, thoughts creep in. It's hard to push them away. I don't want to feel. I just want to numb it out. I can't even talk about the actual things she did. To say what happened and what she did is too much for my head and heart to comprehend.

I just keep asking myself how am I going to get through this all. I don't have any real answers. I had a friend come stay with me for a week three days after I ended the relationship. I was just not coping with anything at all. I don't remember a lot. I was distraught when I was ending the relationship and don't recall much at all. Just snippets. I slept for three days straight after I ended it. I know I've been traumatised. What has stopped me from talking to a helpline in the meantime is I just don't trust anyone really.

I actually have no clue how to get through every minute of everyday. It wasn't a good relationship by any means, finding out that she had been emotionally cheating on me was the last straw.

Besides my friend that stayed with me for a week, I just don't feel anyone actually cares for me.

6 replies

1 - 6 of 6

In response to: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Re: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Hi @Powderfinger sweetheart 9 days is rather early be kind to your self 👍

In response to: Re: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Re: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Hi @Clawde

Yes, very fresh and raw. Thank you.

In response to: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Re: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Hi @Powderfinger,

I'm so sorry that your ex had been emotionally cheating on you. I hear your pain, that would be devastating. It shows a lot of strength that you've organised therapy for yourself and reached out on the forums, they're great first steps to take. I'm sure our community members will be able to offer you some support as well.

Take care of yourself during this difficult time.

CalmingNature

In response to: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Re: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

HI
I'm going through something very similar at the moment, my partner was caught cheating online with various women then blamed me for finding out and being upset and devastated instead of being sorry for the disrespect. I have been going to a counselor during this time as I was already in therapy when this has all been going on. one of the things I have learnt is that trauma bonding is a thing and can make a break up feel almost unbearable.
9 days is very early but can feel like forever when your in the cycle of loss. I just wanted to say I hear you and understand how your feeling, we will both get through this pain even though it feels like it will never end right now, but it will.
i have found writing my thoughts and feelings down and drawing in a sketch book using black charcoal has help me a lot, there is something about the strong black of the charcoal the mess of it that is making me feel better, please rest, be nice to yourself in thought and deed x

In response to: Re: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Re: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

@Former-Member

Thank you understanding a small part of myself and my circumstances. I'm pretty wiped out this evening, the day has felt so long. I'm going to try rest tonight, although I'm finding it hard to do.

Powderfinger.

In response to: Re: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

Re: Severely emotionally cheated on - Devastated and Angry

@Rubyrose1

I feel you would be going through your own pain with being cheated on. I don't think there are any words that can describe the experience. Your partner cheating is their responsibility and ownership to take, not yours. There is no excuses that can justify it. I hope that counselling is helping you.

Art and it's different forms are helpful. I believe in that. I am a writer. Since it has all happened, I am not able to even write. Saying it is hard is an understatement.

Please continue taking care of yourself and doing what is right for you only.

1 - 6 of 6