I'm really unwell

It has happened again. I have been in bed all day and I haven't eaten or drunk anything. And I ran out of antidepressants last Sunday. My depression is so bad that I can't move. I have some anxiety but it's my depression that's the problem.I'm going to get out of bed now and make myself a cup of tea and feed my Pug.

I made some scrambled eggs and cheese, I ate some yoghurt, I made myself a cup of tea and I fed my Pug.

I sent an email to a mental health organisation (who were supposed to call me three weeks ago), I sent an email to my therapist and I sent a text message to my sister.

I too have experienced being paralysed with fear, I don't have that these days, although I still have anxiety as well as my other comorbidities, including depression. I seem to be able to get on with my day most days, and those days when I don't (the treacle days) I think of as glitches... sometimes they're just an invitation to rest and take things easy.

My little cats are loving having me around a lot throughout this pandemic.

By the way if anyone tells you that dogs can get covid, they get a different kind of covid from COVID-19, they can't pass it on to humans and it's nonfatal, and they don't get seriously ill from it, mostly they don't even suffer any symptoms at all. I was told cats could get covid, and became anxious for those reasons until I found that out from my vet.

I'm sending you a hug, give your pug a hug. My cats don't particularly like hugs, but they love a pat and a good scratch behind the ear, and they love getting into a cloth shopping bag and then being picked up in the bag and gently walked around the room. They have lots of fun with that.

Hi @Abner

Thanks very much for your reply...and the hug 🤗

I'm watching a video of a Sex Pistols reunion concert in London in 2007. It's making me feel better. I have never seen them or PiL live but I would have liked to. I have seen the Buzzcocks live though and met them in person.

I will come back and reply soon.

I've never seen the Sex Pistols or the Buzzcocks, are they also a punk rock group? I know there's a show called "Never Mind the Buzzcocks". Is the group progrwhere the programme gets its title from? My music organisation has just had term 2 concert cancelled due to covid, but we're still rehearsing online, so I won't miss out on that at least.

Hi @Abner

Yes, that's where Never Mind the Buzzcocks gets its name from. It's an amalgamation of the title of a Sex Pistols album called "Never Mind the Bollocks" and the name of a punk band called the Buzzcocks. They're both English punk bands from the 70's. I'm not normally into punk but sometimes I like its high energy.

I'm glad that you are able to practice online. How are your cats today? I'm going to go to bed now and watch the documentary about dogs on Netflix. Goodnight 😴

I've just woken up after a nice late night snooze (I've always been a bit of a night owl, and I like the quiet of the very early morning).

My cats are very well, they're going for their vaccinations next Wednesday.

Have you heard of Morten Lauridsen or Gerald Finzi, two favourite composers of mine? I would love to get a copy of the lyrics you mentioned. I'm a fan of Nick Cave's poetry too, not so much the Bad Serds' music, but the lyrics definitely!

Sending you and your pug a hug. My two are called Olaf and Bartok. What's your pug's name?

Hi @Abner

Oh, I'm sorry, I edited my post and removed the song because I didn't want to bore you by talking about punk music. And I found out that the song is about something that could be triggering for some people. I always thought it was about an early sexual experience but apparently it's much darker than that.

I'm a night owl too. I prefer the quiet of the night to the noise of the day. I went to bed at 11pm and woke up at about 3am. I'm going to have a cup of tea and try and go back to sleep because my sister's coming round tomorrow.

The name Finzi sounds familiar but I haven't heard of the other person.

Your cats have very interesting names. They sound like characters in a play. My Pug's name is Ivan.

That's ok. I might be able to find it on the internet. Anyway how are you this afternoon? I'm having a slow day today, I'm about to do some singing practice and then some drawing. I've just washed my beard and moustache with yerba mate shampoo and conditioner.