New Mum to BPD

Hello @Mooma75 and a big welcome to the forums 💕

Gosh I'm so sorry for what you are going through, it would be extremely emotional and heartbreaking. Whilst my situation is different I can relate to a great deal of your situation and emotions and I do feel for you very much.

By now you would have picked up your daughter. I hope it went as well as it could? Boundaries are vital for both of you. Its also important you look after you. I have anxiety as a result of caring for my son. So many carers end up with burnout. Self care needs to be a given.

Here's a link to a group that might provide you with guidance and help with boundaries:

https://saneforums.org/t5/Useful-resources/BPD-Free-family-connections-class/m-p/459296/highlight/true#M519

Also some.links to pages for carers:

https://www.health.nsw.gov.au/mentalhealth/Pages/family-mh-program.aspx

https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/emergency-help/helping-someone-else/

I hope these and being here helps. You aren't alone, there are many that will relate and be able to offer insight, compassion and an ear.

Take care of you 🙏💕

Hello again @Mooma75

On the home page there is a fabulous blog about BPD, also if you scroll down to topics you can select ones of interest. X

Hi. You sound like a good mum. Just tell your daughter how much you love her how much she means to you. Pick one thing each time you see her which is good... Ie her hair.... Her thought or ideas.... How smart she is... Her style...... Her skin.... Just one thing good or that you appreciate. Don't abandon her... Try to do this or have her visit when the younger one is at school until you get some sort of routine or rapport. Small gestures mean. More than big ones. She is still our baby but just grown up... Sorry I am not good at boundaries.... I have had to see a family member less especially when they are really negative and not listening. Some distance has helped... But it makes me feel terrible... But it was too toxic... My help unappreciated... Now the family member is asking. Me to come around with food... But didn't appreciate it before. Not sure this helps.

Update . - We survived day 1

only just ... GP visit today Psychologist tomorrow.
D23 is very low still wanting to harm herself and "just wants to go back to the MH unit"

once she has her medication she sleeps but then we start the roller coaster all over again pretty much every 3 hours.
I have rearranged my life my work and my 10yr old so he does not witness this . Feeling helpless yet feel like I'm holding not just my D23 up but all the relatives who have only my voice over the phone and don't see or hear what I do. This is going to be a long road I know , and I know I will find the strength but heart is in pieces.