RUOK

@Barkly firstly welcome to the forums!

I think the idea behind R U OK day is good, but people go about it the wrong way. For instance at the hospital yesterday (before I was released), they gave everyone smiley face cookies and asked if we were OK. Like I am going to admit it at that point if I'm not! I have the anonymity of a forum for that.

I don't want to be labelled as an 'attention seeker'.

I too found yesterday a trigger, brought back painful memories about my previous workplace. The organisation had a fundraiser for RUOK yesterday. I just wish they would put the words into practice. They did not want to know when I was at my lowest.

Thanks Queenie for the welcome....

It seems as though I'm not the only one that thinks of RUOK day as most of the community would like to think of it.... Me thinks it was one of those ideas thought up by a good intentioning person or people but didn't necessarily think it through... However there are others that have got something out of it so, I guess, good luck to them...

I've been battling depression (diagnosed) for over 20 years, and possibly undiagnosed for 10 before that, I've been on countless medications, seen numerous counsellors and medical professionals, and as mentioned before, been "locked up" twice and hospitalised as well... It just gets so debillitating and tiring. Cost me 2 marriages, which also cost me big $$.... for the last 10 years I've been hoping to catch a fatal disease or have a terminal "accident".... It seems tho that living a healthly non-smoking, non-drinking, non drug-taking life is now "benefitting" me in other ways....

Anyway, I don't want to be an attention seeker either so I'll just crawl back into my hole.... It's nice and dark and quiet in here....!!

I'm going to disagree. I think its a great idea. I follow it on facebook and they have had discussions about how to talk to people, and things that you can say etc. They bring awareness to what is a big problem and they get people talking about it. That's a good thing.

Okay, so maybe some of us aren't in a place where we can open up about how we are feeling but it will help some people. Speaking from personal experience, years ago I was determined to (word that cant be mentioned) myself. I was in and out of hospital and in a really bad place. Then my neighbour that I didnt know very well called me over to the fence and gave me a little hand made gift. Even though I didnt talk to her about my problems, that one little gesture turned my life around and made me think that someone cared.

Just knowing that someone cares is enough to make a difference in some lives, and taking a day to say "I care" is a good thing.

I agree with all of the above.

At different times I have had different experiences regarding the impacts of genuine and ritualised caring. I do see it as simply a secular ritual. It can be something that is positive for many, but it all depends on particvular individuals and circumstances.

Regarding smiley cookies and big smiles ... just wanna make me chuck ... that is actually a form of coercion.

Still I think it is better that the issues are on the agenda rather than being silenced.

That's really good to know @Kurra and I'm really grateful to the people who asked you so you are here to tell us. I did think while I was writing my response that my experience has been so limited because I'm not in the work force and pretty socially isolated that my views are skewed by my main outlet to it being social media. I do think that maybe each year it could get better as the kinks get ironed out and people become more aware of how to deal with the variety of responses that could happen. My personal experiences have just been a bit tainted as in looking at the tokenism on Facebook a bit but again I'm really glad in the real world it's worked for you which is the most important part. Cheers💜😊