Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

47,612Members
1,358,869Posts
1,400,000Visitors

Keeping illness a secret

Surviving85Contributor28 Aug 2016, 8:46 pm AEST

Keeping illness a secret

Hi,

First time on the forum, and hoping to be able to share my experience and get some feedback from people with a lived experience.

I only started to have symptoms of mental illness in my mid thirties, and since then things went downhill pretty quickly. My first admittance to a public mental health facility was as a result of being scheduled, and within two weeks I went from holding down a full time professional role to being In the high dependency unit of the local psychiatric hospital. Since then I have had an additional 3 admissions in 3 years, including over 15 Ect sessions which has significantly affected my memory. I have probably spent 5 months in the last couple of years in inpatient facilities.

The issue is nobody knows except my husband and my parents. People think that I have been overseas but really I have been in hospital. I am not embarrassed by what I have been through, however to protect my career I have had to go down this road.

Keeping everything to myself has worked well for my career but not for the informal support that I probably need. Holding a secret like this can be very challenging and sometimes I just wish I could tell somebody but sometimes the lie itself gets bigger than the truth. How do you tell people that all the overseas trips didn't happen, that you were in fact in hospital? I sometimes feel like I am just waiting for someone to find out the truth.

Thanks for reading.

11 replies

11 - 11 of 11

1 2

In response to: Keeping illness a secret

AppleblossomSenior Contributor29 Aug 2016, 6:10 pm AEST

Re: Keeping illness a secret

I agree about stigma re MI may have effects on career. My ex with schizophrenia did not disclose and would not have had contracts renbewed if he had.... His decision and fair judgement... his issues were in the affect department ... less in the cognitive .. the 2 areas did interact within him and he did lose a few million here & there .. but never lost a job over it cos he could do the boy's talk on the balcony til new young bright things emerged.

I have another take on it though. My NORMAL uncle who was successful and not a bad dude .. said he always kept distance from workers .. it helped his career rise ... he only had grade 8-9 education .. and lives on an island ... dont assume distance .. is a sign there is something wrong with oneself.

I haazard a guess that every single person in the work force .. has issues of one kind or another that is kept behind closed doors. Dont assume that they sense something weird about you ... distancing is often about their own agenda ... which may be protecting you from their inadequecies

I am over the sensing and the weird tingles wooohooo feelings as having definitive meanings ... see them as just invitations to make assumptions without looking at own presumptions.

11 - 11 of 11

1 2