LostAngelSenior Contributor
Last Week was financial and emotional hell ,weekend was somewhat better expect for not regarding my pesonal safety
Last week was hell both finacially and emotionally ,the weekend was an improovement thanks to caring family but I also got so rebellious at times I disregarded thinking of my personal safety by sneaking out there home late at night to hop in my car to go to the online dates house in the dark ,I almost did act on impulsively going there but the few family members who I did tell about my plans to go see him,convinced me not to go through with seeing him at his house at night as our first date ect,cause they where thinking more of my personal safety at the time than I was so yeah Ive kind of lost the plot in some ways,as for today well Ive got first couciller appointment this afternoon as for the weekend I also had a nightmare where I woke up out of breathe cause the nightmare was about another family member getting hurt but not me getting hurt,also I havnt bothered trying to sort out my centrelink payment thats overdue by a week,cause I dont see the point in bothering to fix it ,going as far as asking myself why bother getting paid? so yeah I keep self sabotaging,taking risks and basically self destructive behaviour in multiple ways at the moment lets not even mention the fact I like speeding my car when driving
