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Sad and stuck

SadSharkContributor25 Aug 2016, 1:27 pm AEST

Sad and stuck

Hello.
Im a new member although have been reading these and other forums for awhile now.
Have suffered depression since i was 17 or so had a lot of self esteem issues growing up and never really gotten on top of them.
I am now severely depressed and highly anxious. I am 29 and i havent got a grip on my life.
My relationship is in tatters, i have no house, no job, friends have given up on me, family has given up on me and im going down the gurgler.
I am on medication but its safe to say its not working or my anxiety and depression has gotten so high that it isnt even helping 10 per cent of it.

I have a 2 month waiting period on my private health insurance before i can admit myself, i dont know how i am going to get through 2 more months of this.
Lifeline and all those great helps must be sick and tired of me and feel like i have exhausted all my options with regards to psychologists and gp's.

I cant function anymore and even happy things dont make me happy anymore. Has anyone else been at this point and has something made a difference?
Thanks in advance.

25 replies

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In response to: Sad and stuck

GavinleeSenior Contributor01 Sept 2016, 7:43 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

As I said before, you do what you need to do to make that 2 months, I hope you are already booked in somewhere. If you are try to go to the day groups if they have them, hopefully you will see that they can help over time.

You are not alone, I don't mind trying to help and I'm sure there are more here that feel the same.

Stay safe and don't set yourself huge daily tasks at this stage

In response to: Sad and stuck

NikNikSenior Contributor01 Sept 2016, 7:52 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

Hi @SadShark ,

I'm so glad you reached out and posted on these forums.

You should be really proud of yourself for setting and achieving those challenges.

Please keep connected with Lifeline or other services like Suicide Call Back (https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/)
That's what they are there for.

Take it moment by moment. We're here if you need us.

In response to: Sad and stuck

GavinleeSenior Contributor01 Sept 2016, 11:16 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

@SadShark your last post isn't here but I read it on email.
Maybe download some TV shows, that way your mind won't think as much, I use to DJ karaoke and still have all the gear, if I feel a little low I sing lol.

Make sure you eat and keep hydrated, go and see your psychiatrist and tell them how you're feeling.

In response to: Sad and stuck

SadSharkContributor02 Sept 2016, 2:27 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

I cant cope today....
I just cant do it............. i feel like my heart is being ripped out of my chest... i cant cope...

In response to: Re: Sad and stuck

Unknown userMember02 Sept 2016, 2:50 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

Hi @SadShark, I'm glad that you're reaching out for support when you feel this low. You've had some great responses and wonderful ideas in this thread. Things that can give you good reasons to feel hopefull that you won't always feel this way. Why don't you read back over the responses and see if there is anything you can do this afternoon to ease your distress?

It's great too that you're connected to helplines. This is certainly the time to ring. Have you spoken with anyone today?

In response to: Re: Sad and stuck

GavinleeSenior Contributor02 Sept 2016, 3:46 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

@SadShark Hey again, we've all had those moments.

How about calling a friend or family member and a cuppa and chat, just a little change like that can help.

If it gets bad call one of your support lines, if it gets worse present yourself to your local hospital or call an ambulance.

Just to point out to those who are unaware, the CAT team does not have full staffing at night, so they won't come out to you. There is still hope though, you can call for an ambulance and they will take you to the hospital, if you have ambulance cover its no cost, if you have a healthcare or pension card it's no cost.

If you do have a healthcare or pension card and get a bill, you simply call them and give them your Centrelink number and it's all sorted.

I feel it's good to know this, just in case.

keep talking here SadShark, I keep looking at your posts. And please ask if your not sure of anything.

In response to: Re: Sad and stuck

GavinleeSenior Contributor02 Sept 2016, 4:06 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

@SadShark I wasn't sure if I was ever going to share my story here or if it would get deleted if I went into depth with. I think maybe I should tell you so you can see there is hope and our mind plays tricks on us.

So a few years back my wife decided she wasn't going to support me with/through my mental health issues and we separated, as you can imagine depression set in nearly straight away, at that time I was unaware I had bipolar and I felt so low and my thoughts were telling me I couldn't possibly live without her etc.

I did try to take my own life on more that one occasion, my now ex wife took out an intervention order out against me, I breached that order by calling her and spent a month in jail. OMG I thought to myself, I had never been in trouble with the police, I was the standard married, 2 kids, good job sort of guy.

I got so bad that I ended up in intensive care and apparently I was not responding to anything they tried.

So, here is the good part, I had a house in the UK (lived there for a while) that finally sold and I was able to get get a house here, I met someone and got engaged earlier this year, her family knows everything about me and what's happened and they accept me for who I am and not what I've done and life is pretty good. I go the my group every week and can't believe that I still learn more about myself every day.

So, our minds do lie to us, I am living without my ex and moving on, I am happier than I have been for years.

i hope this helps you in some way

In response to: Sad and stuck

SadSharkContributor02 Sept 2016, 5:49 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

Thankyou Gavinlee.
Your support has been wanderful, along with everyone else and i do appreciate it.

I have tried support lines and gone through my story and asked for help many of a time. I have spoken to family and they are 'supportive' without actually being able to support if that makes sense. At this point 'cmon cheer up- its not that bad' isnt helpful.

I have lost interest in everything, that includes my dogs whom are my release from stress and anxiety. I walk them or pat then and the darkness goes away. I dont feel like it goes away.

I appreciate you sharing your story Gavinlee. It really is similiar in some ways. Its really strange that someone you care about can make you want to give up everything. Doesnt make sense.

I dont feel like i will ever be good enough for someone. Feel like the karma bus is stopping at my stop for awhile...

In response to: Re: Sad and stuck

AppleblossomSenior Contributor02 Sept 2016, 6:19 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

The karma bus and the dhamma are very elusive and mysterious ... the wheel of life can turn and reveal surprisng truths about our own unique nature in the broader sheme of life.

Take care @SadShark

Hello @Gavinlee your story insprational.

We all need to believe those things can actually happen .. to us.

In response to: Sad and stuck

GavinleeSenior Contributor02 Sept 2016, 6:20 pm AEST

Re: Sad and stuck

Come matey, Karma bus, we do certain things because of our illness, it's no an excuse but more of an explanation.
The right medication, the right mind set and a few changes can do wonders.
The "it can be that bad" or "just get over it " certainly isn't a help, if only it was that easy. It's taken years to get to this point, how can it be resolved in a day?
You will have some work to do my friend, but you are going in the right direction already, you're doing something about it, private health, asking for help, coming on here, that all says you have a future.
I hope you can look back in a couple of years and say "God, what was I thinking". I know why I was thinking what I was, but still ask myself why.
The big change that some find hard is putting their mental health first, so what if some medication put weight on (unless that's your issue), overweight but still here is better that not being here.

Having people in your life with mental health issues can also be good, don't take on their problems, but at least you can understand each other.

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