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For my UNCLE

efrCasual Contributor24 Aug 2016, 6:30 pm AEST

For my UNCLE

hello every one. i want to help my uncle, he is now a senior citizen. he has mental disability. we dont know where to start and then just go with how days passed by. He is a good man, a generous one but when my grandfater died (his father) he is always talking with someone and feel nervous about everything, it is where it all started. Sometimes he's ok but there are really times that we are afraid of him. He loves us too much that's why we love him very much. Even we know he was sick we try to hug and talk to him. Time comes that he dont talk to anyone, he dont take a bath, or even eat his meal. But we have still hope that he is fine because he is doing others things like using comport room so he can think things to do. He lived with my other's uncle family. Once i was there, the wife of my other uncle was saying something not good direct to my sick uncle, but as I observed he has that ability to hold his temper and did not hit the the wife of my uncle. We send him to hospital for injection as advice. He'd been ok. But less than a year if Im not mistaken, worst come that he got back to a mental disorder situation. We cant talk to him because he is now hurting people. He is more afraid of everything especially when someone he know died. Saddest is my grandfather died and he is not okay, then my grandmother died and he is not still ok and worst we dont tell him because we dont know what will caused him. I cried too much seeing him secretly looking at the window during the funeral of my grandmother. it hurts us a lot. After that he chose to be at his room. We give him food. Talk sometimes at the window. Give him clothes. But we can give him the medication he needs. He is fine physically and free to do things inside the house. He dont go outside. He is sometimes seen at the corner of the room. I hate those times 😞 Now, we dont know what to do and where to go. He is old. His body is weak. He dont eat. We want help for him. Please help us. I want him to be ok. Im still praying for his second chance of living the world we have. Please help me, please pray for him. Please give us help of what to do. We dont know how we could talk to him. Please give me advice. Thank you. Godbless.

3 replies

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In response to: For my UNCLE

Unknown userMember24 Aug 2016, 9:19 pm AEST

Re: For my UNCLE

Hello @efr, welcome to the Forums. You seem to care deeply for your Uncle and to want to do something to improve his quality of life. He's lucky to have that. It sounds as if things have really deteriorated over the past few years.

If he is taking medication, does that mean that he is seeing a doctor? If that's the case, it might be useful to try to provide the doctor with some additional information about the real condition of your Uncle. Sometimes health practitioners are only working on part of the story and so some needs and issues are not addressed. You could try to ring the surgery or write down some of your concerns so that the doctor can explore them with your Uncle.

It doesn't actually sound like anyone is currently helping your Uncle with his mental health. If you feel that he's getting to the point where he is at risk for harming himself or someone else, you could try contacting the psychiatric triage team (sometimes called CAT team) which will be based at the nearest major hospital. If you are not sure of the number you can give us a call in the SANE Help Centre on 1800 187 263 between 9am and 5pm. We can find that number for you. They can visit your Uncle at home and do an assessment if he meets their criteria.

There is also a phone line specifically regarding the health of older people who may be able to advise you. 1800 200 422. This is called My Age Care and their role is to inform you about what services may be available for your Uncle.

I hope this information helps Efr. Let us know how you go and if there is anything else we can do to help.

In response to: For my UNCLE

utopiaSenior Contributor24 Aug 2016, 9:26 pm AEST

Re: For my UNCLE

@efr. Your uncle is very sick and needs to be seen by professionals in Mental Health.
Ring your local hospital and ask to speak to the CAT (crisis assessment team) or the triage nurse in the community mental health team.
Explain honestly as you have done here, exactly what has been happening. If your uncle doesn't have a good understanding of English , you may need to act as an interpreter when a team member comes out to see him.
Having a mental health disorder cannot be fixed by 1 injection. He most likely will need ongoing medication.
With regards to his violence - this is when you need to ring 000 & ask for the police to attend. I know this may sound extreme and scary, but police often help take patients to hospital when they are violent. It also means that your uncle will be assessed, diagnosed and commences treatment quickly.
Be sure to ask the hospital he goes to for an interpreter, if you do not feel comfortable with this role. It's your right and your uncles right to have an interpreter.
Please don't hesitate. Call your local hospital now and speak to the mental health team.
We want your uncle to get the help he needs & we want your family to be safe.
Please let us know how you get on.

In response to: Re: For my UNCLE

Unknown userMember26 Aug 2016, 12:50 pm AEST

Re: For my UNCLE

Hi @efr,

Welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing your story with us. I'm one of the moderators here like @Former-Member.

@Former-Member suggested a few things for you. I hope they're helpful and you have spoken to your uncle about these suggestions. It sounds like your uncle is feeling hopelessness and unsafe. At times people try to protect themselves and decide to act in certain ways, that others would interpret differently. It would be worth to consult people your uncle trusts on how to keep him safe. I'm glad to hear you're still seeing him as the loving uncle you've always known.

It must be hard for your other uncle's family to look after him everyday too. Please also try to find help for yourself and the family and there are Carer's services around. I'm not sure which state you're from but you'll be able to find something from Carer's Australia and their national number is 1800 242 636.

Best wishes and look after yourself.

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