Looking for someone who understands

Hey @ali2204 sounds like you're doing it tough at the moment. I'm Jynx, one of the moderators, I'm just going to flick you a quick email to check in.

G'day ali2204

This is also my first post of any kind, I understand, I to have major depressive dissorder and I am alone and I take meds for my depression, I am 66 years old, I have been this way for many years. Life is balance Pleasure and Pain and if you get this unbalanced you get depressed, you get so that you no longer have anything that gives you pleasure (anhedonia) so all you have left is pain, then to add to this is the perseeved lack of emotion you may have which can make you feel less of a human and so you feel guilty because you cannot trust yourself to show the right emotional response at any given time, The pain of depression is all over the body like an ache that you cannot get rid of, You may be having a different experience than me as we are all different, but I can assure you you are not alone.

What can you do? when you don't want to do anything?. One thing that is hard to learn sometimes is, that it is ok to do nothing, but it is better to do something no matter how small it is and then pat yourself on the back for doing it, but most of all reward yourself for doing it (eat an icecream) . now I know that you dont want to here this but I will tell you what helped me A LOT, Change your scenery if you can, if you cant then re arrange your furniture, (a change is as good as a holiday), I do this on a regular basis and it keeps me busy, and thinking. I personally have become a nudist at home as it has helped me feel the air and has brightend my moods, I will mention that medications are essential but the thing that will hurt you the most is the horrible mental health system in Australia, it is useless, and if you are not careful to take care of yourself they will literally lock you up in a suposed mental health hospital which you will have to deal with drugaddicts and prisoners from various gaols and you will not receice any therepy other than drugs and may be an odd walk in the park now and then.

So my friend you must take care of yourself as others wont help you.

They say things like "talk to a friend or a loved one" but you can't as you do not want to burden them nor cause them any anxiety. I know exactly how you feel.

To finish: Find what little gives you pleasure and go for it until you no longer feel pleasure doing it then find something else, you have to get that balance back.

Welcome @Smagigy, and can I just say I love the idea of becoming a nudist in your home, that's fantastic.

I just wanted to jump in to say that whilst there are definitely gaps, and parts of the MH system here are in need of serious overhaul, there's definitely still hope. Everyone's journey is different, what works for some won't work for others. Sometimes it's about finding the right MH team - people you can trust, with whom you can feel safe. Keep searching, you might be surprised by what you find. We all deserve to feel heard, to be connected with others, and to have agency and choice in the recovery path we take.

@ali2204 and @Smagigy , welcome to the fourms, this is a wonderful community of very supportive people. I would say that being here has really helped me deal on the days that I would rather not be "here". I get the loneliness that having a mental illness can cause, the dark hole that you can't seem to find your way out of. Here you will find friends that will honestly listen and offer suggestions that may or may not help you. Make sure you have a look around at some of the other threads here and if you find one you like or have something to offer or a question even just jump right on in. Just remember to put the @ amd the name of the person you are talking too.

Hi @ali2204

I just wanted to reach out and welcome you to the forums! It's great to have you here

I'm so sorry that you haven't been able to find the comfort, support and understanding that you need and deserve

I can only imagine the distress of being told that 'you need to make more of an effort' and how these words may have impacted you. It can be heart wrenching and so painful when our experiences of living with a mental health issue are minimized and so deeply misunderstood by those around us

I hope that you will continue to reach out here for support and that through doing so, you find a soft and safe place to fall

Take care,

ShiningStar

Hi @ali2204

I understand completely how you feel. I have found that doing something I enjoy , even if it's a struggle to start, always lifts my mood.

I find it's worth the effort. For me it's art, just picking up a brush and putting paint on a canvas works wonders.

Thinking of you

It has been a pretty tough year that's for sure. Yes if only there was a magic bullet, go for a walk, you will feel better or eat healthy or take up a hobby. What people don't u derstand is how very hard it is to do anything at all some days. You wake up feeling like someone has come in the night and sucked all your energy and motivation to do anything right out of you. I am finding ot helpful to do some quiet meditation because it doesn't take any effort. You can even do it just lying in bed if that is all you can do. You are definitely not alone 🌻