Jumbled Brain

@saltandpepper I hear you friend thank you for helping me with good ideas,hopefully I can help you in return,it sounds like your not feeling good at all about how your treating your family as a result of how your feeling ,it seems like you are feeling so mixed up up right now,I can understand the feeling of wanting to be alone,back to bed ect hang in there cause your really not alone,I sometimes get nightmares too,I hope you get support and you can always chat to me LostAngel

Hello @saltandpepper

I can really feel the pain and anguish you are going through at this moment.
I at times would like to reach out to a help line, but I wouldn't have a clue what to say, it just seems so pathetic when you hear yourself out loud. I don't know if I am 'bad' enough and I worry that I maybe taking up there valuable time. But I also know I would never call if I didn't know there was no other option. I stop myself because I hear so many say that it's a waste of time and more upsetting afterwards because I think there is nothing they can really do anyway!

like you, I have found it helpful being on here, actually reading and knowing there are others

Ike me out there too.

please take care and be kind to yourself 🌻

Hey @Former-Member , I just wanted to pop in to tell you, from the other side of the fence, that there is no such thing as 'bad enough' to chat to someone on a helpline. Your experiences, your pain, your struggles, they matter and are worthy of someone's time - because what is shareable is bearable. Different helplines have different styles too, for some it's more for crisis calls (like Lifeline or Suicide Callback Service) but others, like the SANE Help Centre, are great for just being able to talk to someone to feel heard, explore things in a non-judgemental space, and get stuff off your chest.

I know it's not for everyone, and sometimes there are experiences that are less than helpful; sometimes it's just luck of the draw because you never know who will be on the other end! But I just thought I'd let you (and anyone else reading) know that a helpline worker's time is exaclty as valuable as your time, and if it matters to you, it matters.

@saltandpepper I'm sorry you're going through such a difficult time right now. Sometimes when we snap easily over the smallest things, it's because our resilience and tolerance for distress has been lowered by the ongoing effort required to keep afloat. The fact that you care so deeply about the impact is perhaps something to focus on, as it shows that you're a good person and caring parent, you've just got a lot on your plate right now. We're here with you anyway, and I really do hope things shift and improve for you soon.

@Jynx Thank you for your response, I will have to read it later as I am too upset ATM. Didn't realise it was something caring.

@Jynx great response.

I've rung so many helplines over the years, it does get harder to pick the phone up. I have found that lifeline has the belief that you find the answers to your own questions and situations.

I think being able to do that us not helpful for all people, especially if they are distressed and haven't been able to find any solutions. Also they do cap chats most of the time. Of course that us not such a bad thing. It's just that feeling rushed and pressured to hurry up id prevalent.

@saltandpepper how are you doing now? are you feeling any better?

Hey @Eden1919 sorry I haven't gotten back to you on your post yet, how are you going today?

Thanks for checking in. I'm not really sure what to say. Things are still not making a whole lot of sense to me, still feeling confused and like I'm coming apart on the inside. So I guess, no, not really doing very well at the moment. Things are still feeling a bit overwhelming right now.

@saltandpepper That is ok, I am sorry you are still feeling bad is there anything that usually helps when you feel this way?

@Eden1919 I'm really not sure what's going on exactly. None of the usual fixes have brought any relief from this feeling. I'll talk to my therapist about it when I see him next, he'll have some insight I'm sure. I think, possibly, I may still be coming out of a bit of a PTSD episode. But, this, what's happening, it's new for me. Not something I've experienced before. Been getting this disconnected sensation and it's followed on from something that has, I guess, been a "trigger" to the past. Just wasn't expecting it to happen really. But this has also happened on the heels of the depressive episode I've been coming out of too. Probably isn't helping at all.

That probably didn't make a lot of sense. Sorry. How are you going now @Eden1919

@saltandpepper That makes things difficult talking to your therapist sounds like a good idea. I guess just try and take it easy until you see them and can make some kind of plan. It is always kind of scary when new feelings or experiences start happening because we haven’t figured out how to deal with them yet.

Um I am still having a bit of a weird time my call with my team today went a little um well let’s just say it wasn’t very useful but that is life sometimes I suppose, now I guess i am just on my own with it all but that is ok.