today was a better day ,just cant read someone's message again

hi everyone today has been a better day thank you for your continued support ok so whats happend today compared with yesterday,today has been alot calmer for me only a few outbursts but Im talking really calm feelings the rest of the time,I did some midfullness and listened to lots of calming self soothing type music this afternoon which helped emensely to bring a state of calm to my mind,my only concern currently is that Im again worried about reading a family members message I have put off all day in reading this latest message from a family member,I have chosen to have a real calming day/cooling off day I supose,lots of quiet,lots of music,I avoided doing anything that hasnt been completely nessaserry to do today I ended up playing computer games for while this afternoon as well just any good activity that doesnt require energy,also deep breathing excervises and trying to remain in the moment,I would love to have a holiday as Im sure many of us need a holiday after the strange year thats been 2020, I wish I could have a holiday but the earliest possible time to do that and be able to truely relax and get away from it all wont be untill January possibly and as for christmas it will be low key like most other people this year.