BPD

I've only recently been diagnosed as well, however I found Facebook support groups and things like that help a lot. A lot of the people in these groups post explanations on certain aspects of BPD and their symptoms, DBT, and others.

Hey New2BPD welcome aboard! I see you have a lot to deal with atm and i'ts great you have come to a very supportive place. There are other threads you might find helpful as you navigate your BPD. When you have time, have a peek at some of the forum topics including Social Spaces, Useful resources and Looking after ourselves for example. Welcome 🙂

Hi @Bubblegummah thank you for your response! I have looked on Facebook, but I am reluctant to write on any of these due to my name showing up. I know I need to own this, I'm just not ready for extended friends and family to become aware of this until I have a full understanding. I just don't want any judgement or questions to come flooding in that I cannot yet give an honest answer to. I hope you find peace and comfort with your BPD once you find your feet with it all 🌼

Hi @Iris Thank you for the warm welcome and suggestions. I will definitely look into those threads. My confusion at the moment is my lying. Although little, this has caused a lot of pain, distrust and problems for myself and those around me. I feel it is mainly when I assume a certain outcome so I go into flight or fight mode. And a majority of the time it isn't even intentional. This is a huge thing I need to work on and stop. I know I can do it, I just want to also know if there are other pwBPD that do or have done this and what has helped them break this "habit" Thank you again for your suggestions 🙂

Hi and welcome, @New2BPD , it's good to have you here, where there are people who can relate to what you're going through.

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@New2BPD wrote:

I need and want to acknowledge what I do, how I do it, how to stop doing it and to stop hurting those that mean the most to me.

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I am aware, I am scared, I am willing and I am ready.

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I am impressed with your attitude - I think that's half the battle, being aware and willing to learn /change. Good for you 🙂

I don't have BPD, but if you type 'BPD' into the search bar, you'll find lots of threads about it. I see you have already figured out the tagging system...ahead of the game!

I hope you enjoy exploring the forums, and find listening ears and the support and information you're looking for.

Hi @New2BPD . Thanks for deciding to reach out to the forums about BPD. Like you, I have BPD and it was difficult for me when I was first diagnosed in my late 20s - I'm 42 now- and I struggled to understand it. I also have schizophrenia and depression which makes life interesting at times. For me, I have found that reading up on the condition helps and getting a support team of people who know about the condition is important. This means a GP and a psychiatrist or a psychologist who can help you with the problems with emotions and relevant issues you may encounter. Feel free to tag me using the @ function if you want to chat.
Take care

Judi9877

Hi @Bubblegummah and welcome to the forums! I also have BPD and would just like to let you know that I'm here if you'd like to chat. Just use the @ function and use my name.

Take care.

Judi9877

Hi @Judi9877 thank you for your message. I met with mental health professionals today. After a long 2 and a half hour session, I am exhausted. My partner/support person was with me also. The guilt and shame I am feeling right now is to say the least overwhelming. I have steps in place to go through therapies so that's a start. I just feel like such a burden. After the absolute he'll I have put my partner through, he is still at my side. I feel undeserving of this by a mile. I have done some horrid things and don't want that to be how I am perceived as a person. I don't want to be like this any more! I felt great about getting help, I still want to go through with it. I just feel really crappy after today and the truths I finally told. It was extremely hard as I have always buried things or lied. It has been a mega day today. Did you have these days and what helped you through them? Any insight or suggestions would be greatly appreciated 🙏

Hi @New2BPD

Welcome to the SANE Forums! I am a Moderator here at the SANE Forums. It sounds like despite feeling good about getting help, yesterday was really intense and difficult. How are you travelling today @New2BPD?

Thinking of you!

Kindest Regards,

Amour_Et_Psyché

Hey @New2BPD ,

I totally admire your courage and your openness to recovery. Knowing and acknowledging the challenges you currently have (e.g. lying) is the first step. However, you have moved beyond this and see your Iying as an evolutionary survival skill (fight or flight). You are human, and so these impulses will come.

My experience with BPD tells me communication is key. Being open and communicating helps shed light on possible assumptions which potentially cause you to feel you need to go into fight/flight mode. This skills takes practise. Not just for you, but for your husband. For example, communication to a pwBPD may include "I am going to the shops, then the bank, then the library and will be back by 3pm, otherwise I will call..", rather than "I'm going out and will be back soon". I found the clarity and openness helped me to trust the person more so I wouldn't have to lie about things. This is my experience, but we are all different.

It's great to see you reach out, knowing your anonymity will be kept. We welcome you with open arms!

Hugs,

BPDSurvivor