Coping with a delusional husband who does not accept he's mentally unstable (psychotic)

Hi @TheGreatestStar

I am a moderator of the SANE Forums. I wanted to begin by extending a very warm welcome to you!

I can't begin to imagine how difficult it has been for you over the last year with your husband (and son). One of the most difficult things around having a loved one experience psychosis is a paired lack of insight into their mental instability and a coinciding refusal to receive treatment. I hope that your GP is able to help him access the treatment he very much seems to need. In the meanwhile, given how difficult this must all be on you, I would definitely advocate for you to reach out for your own supports. Do you have any supports in place for yourself? Please know you are most welcome to call our helpline (1800 18 72 63) or utilize our chat service. However, if you are experiencing a crisis or emergency, please call Lifeline (13 11 14) or 000.

Additionally, I am sincerely sorry that you have not received a reply to your post as of yet - it is incredibly difficult not getting a timely response when you are not coping. Sometimes it can be a bit of a slow start to building connections on peer support forums such as ours. I'm not sure if being in the school holiday period is also affecting your difficulty getting a response? Nonetheless, I hope that a Forums Member or Community Guides (@eth, @Faith-and-Hope, @Shaz51, @CheerBear, @Teej, @outlander and @frog) will respond to your post in the near future.

Please take care of yourself in the best way you can!

Kindest Regards,

Amour_Et_Psyché

Hello @TheGreatestStar

When mental illness strikes it can be a confusing time and we can feel helpless and alone.

You have raised some concerns and frustrations that we as carers often feel.

I don't know what state or territory you are in but your local Mental Health Act is readily available on line and sets out the criteria for involuntary assessment and treatment. Usually harm to self or others is a key feature of this.

There is a lot of grief in a diagnosis accompanied by social and financial sequelae.

"Lack of insight" is the medical term for when a patient is not able to realise that they have a problem. I will tag you in some talks that explain this.

It was not until our MH crisis settled that I realised the emotional toll it put on myself. I got support in a number of ways and this included carer support through a MH program, counseling, my GP did a mental health plan so I could get Medicare rebateable sessions and I did see a bulk billing psychologist, I did however find a much better fit through a counselor with a rural health service in the area I lived in at the time. Psych education was really helpful in understanding the nature and treatment of the various diagnoses that were tendered in relation to my husband. I came across this forum after our crisis had settled somewhat and really enjoy the mutual support and encouragement. I still get maintenance counseling and as we have moved I am taking advantage of the free phone counseling via the carer gateway while I look into local services.

hello and welcome @TheGreatestStar

letting you know that you are not alone my friend

my husband has had lots of diagnosis , inherited depression , GAD, SAD, Bipolar 11 Adhd just to name a few

I amd my husband`s 2nd wife and i have 4 step children who are all adults now with their own mental health problems

my husband was just on anti depressant before ending up in hospital

I came across this forum on the night we came home from our crisis and have found it very supportive

we have seen psychologists and psychiatriss who have all washed their hands of my husband

and after one Psychlogist blamed me , my husband has cancelled all help altogether

my husband has stopped his meds many times and until I say something and then he starts taking them again

You have raised some concerns and frustrations that we as carers often feel.as @Former-Member , @Former-Member have said is very true

Hi @TheGreatestStar and welcome to the forums. I've been away and only now seen your post. So sorry for the delay. Also I'm mostly over on the lived experience side of the forums as I'm no longer a carer, tho I was for 18 years.

I feel for you with the situation you are in. A year is a long time when coping with such difficulties. I agree with everything @Former-Member @Former-Member and @Shaz51 have said and want you to know there are other avenues for getting someone scheduled. They are not easy paths, but they are options. One is to contact the 'CATT' - crisis and triage team - of your nearest hospital with a mental health unit, another is to actually ask the police to do a 'welfare check' on your husband. Both will do an assessment and make the decision as to whether or not he needs to be hospitalized. You could also ask your GP to recommend another who has mental health experience and qualifications.

I know it's really painful to have to take such steps with a loved one (I went through it with my now adult child and have also been on the receiving end of such processes) - but it's not harder than what you are already dealing with in my experience. And it will mean he gets the expert help he needs and hopefully an accurate diagnosis, and you will get some respite to sort out everything else in your life, including your son's needs. And also you'll be able to research more specifically what your husband is experiencing and find suitable supports for him and yourself.

Said with care.

If you want to address a reply to a particular person type @ and you will see a drop down box where you can click on the name you want. If you don't see the name there then type it and it should appear.

I do hope you find being here supportive and helpful and again apologize for the delay responding. Unfortunately it does sometimes take a little while to get a response as we are all just other people dealing with life as best we can.