Thoughts in my head

Hi @BlueBay

So sorry to read that you are still struggling. How did I cope when suffering this way with depressive suicidal thoughts? By distracting from those thoughts replacing them with something else more uplifting/positive (I.e. Dreams of the future - seeing myself "enjoying activities" ); keeping my mind and body busy (putting my full concentration on something else to block out the negative/suicidal thoughts, exercise, craft, walking along the beach etc - distraction, distraction, distraction. Keeping as active as possible and practising deep breathing to relax in between. By not drinking alchohol or taking drugs to numb (always made me more depressed). Changing my vision of the future to a good one - visualising what I would like it to be and practising this.

But mostly by focusing on all the good things in my life regardless of how small and concentrating on that - not on how I am feeling (which is deceiving).

Working on changing my catastrophic thinking (believing the worst will happen) to more grounded, positive thoughts (will handle life dealing with issues one day at a time - leaving the past there not looking back and learning to not worry about the future.

Even watching an uplifting movie, listening to relaxing music or YouTube docs, stories etc or phoning a friend helped. I also cross stitched which helps me to relax. Talking to a trusted counellor and following what she would advice helps too. All helped.

"Anything but dwell on negative thoughts" - don't give them any focus my friend. Dare yourself to dream at those times - to believe good things will and can happen. It's about turning the thinking around "consistently" and the mood can follow.

By evening after doing all this I was so exhausted And would fall asleep (sometimes to awake to nightmares but would take a deep breath and go back to sleep). I would wake up depressed the next morning but pushed myself to stay active and the depression/anxiety eased.

Do you have a hobby/interests you can do and /or share with others that you really enjoy and look forward to? If you can do this on a regular basis it will lift your mood. Try and not give into the low mood and thoughts - that's the key.

@BlueBay - did you end up gaining proper treatment for menopause? How you found yourself getting worse since peri-menopause/menopause? I was at my worse at this time. I also found suppressed memories of my past raise their heads at this time for me to deal with. Are you experiencing chronic anxiety as well? If so perhaps seeing a gyneocologist (known for his/her's understanding of menopause and depression - research a must), for treatment for this time of life should help reduce your anxiety/depression a lot so you can manage much better. It made me feel as bad as you are feeling - may be worth pursuing.

Hang in there and don't give up - it will eventually pass. Sending warm supportive hugs ❤️🌷

Hi @Former-Member

Thank you so much for your reply. I am going to google a gyno that deals with menopause/depression. I actually need to go so this is a good time to go.

actually i think that you're right - my anxiety and depressoin is a whole lot worse at PMT time. And so emotional at that time of the month.

I was very quiet this afternoon, i actually had to work this morning. and today i am exhausted. i feel that when these thoughts come to mind I actually want to do it. Like another thought i had of this vision - drive to a cliff and sit right on the edge and call for help. It's like I would love the emergency services to come to rescue me, help me. It sounds pathetic doesn't it?

i am distracting myself tonight by cooking dinner and watching tv.

Hobbies - not really. Although i do enjoy walking (but don't do enough), i like to knit (i was thinking i might even start knitting a scarf tomorrow); i love the beach (too cold down here), love my dog and walking with her and gardening.

thanks for your supportive hugs. how are you going? xxxooo

Hi @BlueBay

Always here for you. It is sounding like hormonal related depression/anxiety, at least making it much worse for you - so the gyno is the first step to feeling better I have no doubt. And you will find the knitting will relax and help distract from the depressive thoughts. That's all they are - pay them no heed and replace them with seeing a better future - a happier, healthier you. And it will happen my friend. This will pass. I am living testimony (it took a little while but this phase eventually passes - some need more help than others).

In the old days when some women experienced severe menopausal depression they ended up being institutionalised - but not so any more with all the available treatments on offer now. It's just a matter of finding the right medical professional. I know HRT has its risks but it really helped eased my anxiety/depression; I also take thyroid medication which also helped (thyroid disorder can cause bi-polar, anxiety, depression, psychosis etc).

I am doing well my friend - had a bumpy ride with husbands latest surgery but he is picking up well and our love for each other offers strength. He does have to further investigate cancer treatment in mid June - but will cross that bridge when I come to it and believe all will work out. One day at a time or I would be overwhelmed. I am currently enjoying cross stitching at the moment - I am stitching a big project of an angel. She is called "Angel of The New Dawn" - representing a new beginning. I look forward to my bingo lunch days with my friends once a week and I find this gives me a huge lift.

When you finish your scarf would love to see a photo of it here on SANE 🙂 xxxx

---

@Sadgirl wrote:

Hi @Former-Member

actually i think that you're right - my anxiety and depressoin is a whole lot worse at PMT time. And so emotional at that time of the month.

I was very quiet this afternoon, i actually had to work this morning. and today i am exhausted. i feel that when these thoughts come to mind I actually want to do it. Like another thought i had of this vision - drive to a cliff and sit right on the edge and call for help. It's like I would love the emergency services to come to rescue me, help me. It sounds pathetic doesn't it?

---

Hello again @BlueBay

Just meant to say in the last post re the above - no, your thoughts aren't pathetic at all. It's just representing how you are feeling at the moment:- "vulnerable needing help" - those thoughts are crying out for it, not to end your precious life but to save it! And going to the gyno will be a first step, among other steps, to receiving that help for a better quality of life. One small step, one day at a time and you will get there. Don't give up as you will feel the sun shining on your face once again (even warmer than before) xx ❤️