feeling inadequate (possible tw)

Hi @Eden1919 , I am so sorry you are struggling and just wanted to let you know that I read your post. I am sorry you haven't been able to rest properly because of this pressure you are feeling.

I get frustrated at dancing around some topics on here as well. I wish I could add something more helpful, but, I am struggling to get the gist of your post. i can only add that I enjoy having you around and your contributions to the forums. You are very smart, compassionate and kind.

Hi @Eden1919

I'm sorry you're feeling inadequate re being/doing 'enough'. That seems to be the crux of it hey? I'm assuming you're talking about an Eating Disorder; is this right?

Like any addiction, an ED compels the sufferer to continue habitual behaviours to feel a sense of normality, but more importantly - safe. I totally understand this ok.

In my own case, putting delicious food in my mouth is a form of self medicating to prop up feel-good hormones like dopamine; a habit formed in childhood to cope.

It's difficult to assess how to change as this habit was created by my inner child's reasoning; something irrational, destructive and obscure as adult concepts go. So to understand what I'm experiencing I need to understand the child I once was.

You use the term 'enough' many times in your post. You've obviously picked up on its relevance but are finding it hard to describe the 'doing' without using specific words the system picks up on.

If you want to talk I'll respond when I can as I don't get immediate notifications; they come each night at 10pm EST. I can pop in now and then to see how you're traveling if you like. If we're both online at the same time it'd be better I guess.

This is a discussion I probably need to have Eden. I don't engage with anyone about it, so maybe it's time I did. Thankyou for bringing the topic up.

Kind thoughts;

Hope 🤗

@Gazza75 thanks i am sorry it really doesnt make sense when i read it back lol but i just get so worried that it will get taken down. it is mostly in relation to the amount of exercise i am wanting to be doing.

@Hope4me yes it is in relation to an eating disorder. I guess for me it doesnt feel like a habbit more like something i cant not do like i dont get pleasure from it, all i get is either more or less anxiety depending on if i have been "good" or not.

@Eden1919, think we can talk exercise, but, nothing to.specific, ie time and. Distance. I think we should be able to if we use adequate warnings. For people.

What kind of exercise do you do?. I. Work out at gym a lot. Except when I go to my farm.

I can't talk about weight, and that's the thing I need the most help. With Ughgh lol 🙂

@Gazza75 i am not ignoring you but i am not sure how to reply.

No worries @Eden1919. Hope you're doing OK.

Hi @Eden1919 , there is a fitness / motication thread I can tag you into. It's called 'My f@itness journey' it's not very busy, but, its nice to read what other people are up to and get some motivation at times.

@Gazza75 please dont i have seen that thread and found it EXTREEMELY triggering like i ended up crying for the rest of the day. i dont mean to be rude to anyone on that thread but that sort of thing is the opposite of helpful for me and this issue isnt about me trying to achieve my fittnes goals it is about the fact that i cant seem to stop myself from destroying my body one way or another. i know you mean well but please dont tag me in any thread like that.