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BeaSenior Contributor
Sisiter with SZ. Lives on own but parents did all (shop, clean, organize, fransport). One parent had health crises, other now carer. Expectation that I replace & do all. Have own life, kids, job etc & getting resentful 😞 Started sayiing No.
Parents think they allowing her independance. They have taken on al the responsibilty. Without it, the management of her life will crumble like a pack of cards.
In response to: Encouraging or is it enabling?
Ali11Senior Contributor
Hi @Bea, that sounds like you are in a tough position with your family. Have you been able to discuss your concerns previously with your parents?
In response to: Encouraging or is it enabling?
Shaz51Senior Contributor
wow that is a lot for your parents @Bea
can they get outside help to come and help
and I am thinking and wondering how you are going through this
we are here for you xx, you are not lone my friend
Hello @Ali11
In response to: Re: Encouraging or is it enabling?
BeaSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: Encouraging or is it enabling?
BeaSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: Encouraging or is it enabling?
Ali11Senior Contributor
Good luck with your chat today @Bea, we're here if you need to come on and talk about it. It sounds like your parents are very sweet and focused on family.
In response to: Re: Encouraging or is it enabling?
Shaz51Senior Contributor
how did you go @Bea , we're here if you need to come on and talk about it.xx
and remember to put a @ in front of members names so we get your message
@Ali11
In response to: Re: Encouraging or is it enabling?
AppleblossomSenior Contributor
Hearing you loud and clear about your questioning what is enabling or encouraging ....
A sibling should not carry the same reesponsibility or duty as parents.
@Bea
In response to: Re: Encouraging or is it enabling?
BeaSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: Encouraging or is it enabling?
Shaz51Senior Contributor
@Bea, my mum is a very strong and indepentent woman
took herr a long time to accept meals on wheels and other help around the house , I still do a lot of it xx
In response to: Re: Encouraging or is it enabling?
BeaSenior Contributor
Have pre-warned I won't be assisting with 'wiping' duties though after having to clean up after what I call the 'big brown bear day' when out in public.
Sounds pretty harsh doesn't it? "Nope, not coming. Do the best you can until your next carer is due". I'm ok with that now though.
I think I may have carer burnout... I may start a new topic...
I couldn't stop them calling me on weekends or other days off to ask me to go drive to her house to put her shoes on, shower her, do her dishes etc.
@Bea wrote:
Sigh.. my little chats continue... some ideas like seeds may take root & grow, others fall on the hard ground to waste away. Cannot change my folks, only point out some observations & be available to listen & help them get more help if/when they decide they have had enough.
I queried what
required on my work daysbut by saying No they have
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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