How do you answer the hard questions?

@Eden1919 Hi Eden1919 yes that is a tough one .... personally I would be honest and just say that I have on going private health issues which made it impossible for me to study during those years and still affect me to this day. Hoping that they don't inquire any further (I think most people) would accept as soon as you say 'private' they would not inquire any more.

When I felt safer with the person then I would tell to a point but that would be a long way down the track as once it is out you cannot get it back.

Still when I have been manic I just blurt out my mi status to everyone who is willing to listen and (at least on the surface) they have been sympathetic. Otherwise it can be a really lonely ride.

Good luck with your studies. I really hope it turns out well for you. I would love to get back to uni but at the moment it would be a trigger as it would over stimulate me. Love greenpea xxx

@Bunniekins yes perhaps private health issues is a good idea. and man it is hard not to bulrt out the most random things when manic i sometimes actually have to cover my mouth in crowds to stop from yelling stuff out. but in conversation it is so much harder especially cause i dont tend to realise what i am saying until a few seconds later when i actually hear it out of my mouth because of course my mind has already moved on. and i hope one day you can go to uni again i am not at all sure how this will go for me and it is certainly a trigger for me as well but i decided i didnt give a stuff anymore and that i was just going to try and see what happens. i am done with people stopping my life from progressing simply because i might get sick again like so what i am not even well on meds in therapy and away from any stress so i figured i may as well try and get something done even if i am still sick. of course that may be easier for me to do seeing as i dont have any children to look after and no one depending one me.

@Eden1919 Lol! problem is I cannot cover my mouth!! I just blurt out the most outrageous things. It is just terrible .... you are right you know once I get all my stuff together I will go back to uni. I am sick of people who don't care about me anyway influencing my life .... the things I want to do I should do and they can go and spin. You have got the right attitude to succeed. I am sure you will. 🙂

@Bunniekins hahaha!!! i dont cover my mouth in time most of the time. half the time it is after i said it . i mean as far as the uni stuff goes i may very well not succeed but i really dont care anymore i mean i feel like if these doctors cant even help me then they have no business telling me how to live my life. i am just tired of being stuck and if i am going to be forced to stay alive then i need to learn how to do things even when i am not coping because that is going to be most of my life so i will see what happens. i hope you do go back and try sometime when you are ready i am sure you have it in you somewhere

hi @Eden1919 I would definitely not tell new people about mi.

I lost all my relationships due to 7 years of very bad MI and then I had to start from scratch with literally no friends. Making friends is very hard for me so there is no need to add to that the complication of whether or not to talk about my MI to new people. I lie all the time to cover it up or detract from it & it goes fine. I got used to that very quickly becuase there's a lot of repetition when you're meeting new people. I've very slowly made friends & if I choose to tell them about my MI once I trust & know them then that's fine. But it's not an intro.

I'd just say you've had health issues or were caring for a family member (i.e. yourself) with health issues. Then say it's private or you'd rather not go into it cos it's a bit stressful & people will leave you be. It's great that you're thinking about making friends in advance & will have a strategy in place.

More importantly, what are you studying?? That's really exciting & good on you.

Is making friends something that comes easy to you? Do you have any existing friends/family & how do you manage the mi issue with them?

@BryanaCamp thats not good about your friends leaving you. i do have some friends but a lot of them i have met in the hospital and the only others that still talk to me pretty much also have some mental health issues of their own. not the same as mine but still actually come to think of it none of my old friends who didnt have mental health issues still talk to me after they found out i was in hospital for it. i never planned to tell them but we were supposed to meet up and i had to cancel because they wouldnt let me out of the ward and so i couldnt go and ugh still after that they just never spoke to me again. it is sad but i cant force them to talk to me so i just left it and said nothing even though i thought that was a shit reason to ignore someone.

as for what i am studying i am studying international relations and a language

hey @Eden1919 wow international realtions & a language sounds totally awesome! you're looking to the future there, good on you.

My old friendships were no good so it's good they ended. I have nice friends now, it just took an amazing amount of work to establish & maintian those new friendships. I'm in my mid-40's and you sound quite young so the good news is you can make awesome freindships at any age (even after most people have married off & are raising families at my age you can still find cool people to hang out with!). You sound really freindly and likeable so I don't see any reason why you wouldn't develop lots of nice new friends.

I live in a big city so that probly helps with making friends. I use meetup. I'm sorry you've been through the wars with hospital. It's good you're making your own goals & branching out now.

Are you planning on going to any o'week (orientation week) stuff? From memory (and it's about 20 years ago) that was a fun & good time to meet some people, before the tutes and assignments & deadlines kick in. I think it would be well worth the effort if you can manage it.

@BryanaCamp o week already happened lol but its ok i dont like big groups of people anyway. i am glad you have good friends now. and i hope i meet some nice people but i take a while to get used to people i am ok at making friends it is just hard to get close with some people mostly because i always feel like i am hiding a huge secret. and for me even if my friend had accidentally hurt someone badly i would want to know that they felt like they could tell me if they wanted to. i am not one to scare off easily unless of course the person is dangerous. but i just hate the feeling of hiding stuff that to me is just part of my life it feels like i am hiding the fact that my name is X or that i am X race like it is weird to hide those things and feels uncomfortable. but i know sometimes for safety we have to hide it.