LoumarieCasual Contributor
High functioning alcoholic
I’ve been regular drinker for many years and I hate how alcohol controls my life. A colleague at work confided in me that he was a ‘functional alcoholic’ and I had never heard this term before, so I googled it. It described me. I am a high functioning alcoholic.
I never thought I was an alcoholic as my drinking never got in the way of my responsibilities. I work full time. I don’t drink and drive. I only drink at the end of the day after everything is done and dusted. I stopped drinking back in 2014 after this revelation and stayed sober for 14 months. Then I lapsed on a holiday and gradually slid the slippery slope back to the same regular drinking pattern (wine in the evenings).
I know my drinking will eventually cause me serious health issues but I just can’t stay off it. I wake up in the middle of the night with the guilts, and I promise myself I’ll stop the next day, but that thinking only lasts till mid afternoon and then my whole thought patterns change. It’s like I am a different person.
Can an anyone else relate to this? I need some advice on how to stop. I don’t want to attend AA. I am socially anxious and I could think of nothing worse. I’ve stopped before so I know I can do it. I just need to get into the right frame of mind to do it again and stay off the cursed stuff forever. Thanks in advance.