I was promised and funded for support, so where is it?

I grow weary of this NDIS fiasco. Yes, I am thankful I received a package but disappointed nobody wants to support me. I've approached several (about 10) organisations and individual workers (on hire up) and nobody is interested in being my support worker, despite ample funding. People say "oh we'll get back to you tomorrow" and never do despite me calling several times. I feel saddened. I must be labelled "difficult to work with" or something. I really thought it would be different now but because I wasn't funded for support coordination, I have to look for my own supports and therapies myself. Nobody is interested. I'm on the verge of giving up. I live pretty isolated lifestyles and now I've given up alcohol and only take medications prescribed to me (no illicit drugs for 11 years now), things are pretty well isolating. Yes I go to college but I don't think of that as a social setting at all. I don't talk to people there except for my Mrs and half the time she isn't listening. For the past 3 weeks she has had her kids here and told me I have to quietly play second fiddle while they are here. Most of the time I spend in bed wishing the days away. I know the family talk about how much time I spend in bed but I really couldn't care less. I support my cousin via telephone and face to face, but she doesn't know my secret struggle just to stay in the world.

I don't know if I should be angry at the lack of support I am receiving. I only ever really get angry at myself so I just don't know. I've tried making complaints and got nowhere, oh well.

I'll shut up now.