Confused wife, paranoid husband

Hi @Lily,

It sounds heartbreaking to feel like you've lost your husband to mental illness. Remember though, that he can recover. From the sounds of, this is relatively new in the relationship, meaning that this seems to be his second episode - is that right?

Over time, couples can work together to develop strategies to stay well and to manage through crisis. This planning usually happen when they are in a period of wellness again. You mentioned that you were unsure if he was diagnosed but is on anti-psychotics? Can you tell me more about this? Is he currently receiving any treatment or support from a health professional? It might be helpful to get in contact with them to let them know what's happening. They might not be able to disclose information without your husband's consent, but they can take note of what you report.

Another thing to consider, is to get involved in his treatments. Perhaps when he is well again you can make plans together to enable this.

There's a few members that you might want to connect with on here. @Emmelle cares for someone who has paranoid personality disorder, who seems to have some similar symptoms to your husband. She's written about it here. I wonder if she'd like share some of her experiences here. Also, there the 'Wives Caring for Husbands thread, which you might want to join in on. I wonder if some of the recent contributors, @Former-Member @Shaz51 and @Violet could share some thoughts? How do you support your partner?

CherryBomb

Hello @Lily, @CherryBomb

My husband wants me to go to the meeting with him as he forgets things, now they want to decrease his one of his medications , there is pros and cons about doing this

I completely understand where you are coming from! My partner of six years has schizoeffective disorder and in the past six years he has had two major episodes which have landed him with a one way flight to the pysch ward....we live five hours drive from the hospital. Prior to me bring on the scene he was in hospital annually ....his stays have been up to six months....I was finally starting to feel less on edge as we are now going on three years without a hospitalisation but this past week has been quite awful and I fear he is becoming unwell again. I have a teen daughter in year 11 and I teach full time so am quite exhausted already but I am fearing the worst and my gut tells me this is not going to go well as he is becoming a little paranoid, beginning to say quite inappropriate things ( things he would not normally say) gets very defensive if I question him and is becoming secretive.......I recognise these signs from previous experiences and rang his caseworker yesterday ( caseworker is filling in and doesn't know my partner) ...he tells me he will ring him but I know it will be pointless as my partner at this stage can also hold a normal conversation.....his family are interstate and have spoken to him at my request and all say he sounds fine........but designing an engine that will run on water is not fine and is something he tried to do the last time he ended up in hospital. Like you I don't want to talk about it with friends as it is our business and also I have found in the past that unless they have been thru this type of trauma themselves some find it very difficult to comprehend. At this point in time I have been able to shield my daughter from this as she spends most nights in her room studying or at work or netball training but if we don't get help soon it will end as it always has with my partner disappearing in the bush lands, the police being called to search and then him being detained in the emergency ward with chemical and physical restraints until the RFD can collect him!!! I have calmly tried to tell my partner I feel that he is 'slipping' but of course those conversations are pointless as he is the last person to notice and he has told me in the past he quite enjoys his psychotic episodes when he believes he can change the world, has the world's issues in his head and endless money to spend....all fanciful but all I can do now is prepare for the worst .... I go into ' damage control' mode....as soon as he has the actual episode I need to transfer our money to an account he cannot access, hide his wallet and phone.......sounds awful but it has to be done....for now I will just keep things as calm as possible, talk with him about everyday things to keep him in touch with reality and see what happens next!!! I do know exactly how you are feeling!!!! Take care x

Hi @Lily,

Thought I'd check in to see how things are with your husband? More importantly, how are you?

@Attahua husband's has just been admitted to hospital, which you can read about here.

Hello @Lily, have been thinking of you today , How are you today ??

Hello @CherryBomb, @Attahua

sending you hugs my friend @Lily

how are you today ??