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Feeling burnt out

Mumo6New Contributor15 June 2018, 7:06 pm AEST

Feeling burnt out

Hi there, This is all new to me but i have been reading alot of posts and heard so many courageous stories people have shared. At the moment i feel i have no fight left in me . I have been married to my bpd husband for 20 years, Have 6 beautiful complex children 4 with autism. My husbands mental illness alone has taken a huge toll on me, at the moment he is not in a good state of mind and im not sure if i can continue to care for him and our kids.The emotional abuse has damaged our family, has anyone left a bpd marriage ?I know its not easy but how do you leave when he refuses to acknowledge its over.Thankyou for letting me vent

2 replies

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In response to: Feeling burnt out

JupiterSenior Contributor15 June 2018, 9:39 pm AEST

Re: Feeling burnt out

Hi @Mumo6 and welcome to the forums!

It makes complete sense to me that you feel you have no fight left in you at the moment. Supporting someone experiencing borderline personality disorder can be very challenging and can put strain on relationships. You are also looking after 6 kids (4 with special needs) which would be challenging enough on its own.

You may have already read these but here are some posts from others who have a partner with bpd: here and here.

Another resource that might be helpful is our BPD guide here which has a section for family, friends, and carers.

Spectrum also has some resources for family and friends.

I'm sure you will find others on the forum who can relate to your experiences and share their perspectives. Good luck!

Jupiter

In response to: Feeling burnt out

frogSenior Contributor16 June 2018, 7:12 am AEST

Re: Feeling burnt out

Hi @Mumo6 Welcome. You have a really heavy load and have done incredibly well to care for and support your family. It sounds like you are in need of care and support, and you have every right to make space in your life for you. It took me decades to do this for myself, and it's an ongoing struggle. I can't address your bigger question, but I hope you can see a way forward. Incremental progress is important along side the big decision you're facing. With lots of demands, starting small with self care makes sense. Is there something that you can do today that's just for your own wellbeing? Thinking of you.

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