Feeling awful

Hi all,

This won’t be as verbose or indeed interesting as others on this forum but needed to talk to people and thought this would be the best place to come.

I was diagnosed with anxiety around a year ago. I was taking medication for this and all was well. I then came off the meds under doctors recommendation as I was doing a lot better. Up until now, everything had improved and life felt on the up.

The past few days, my anxiety has been getting progressively worse. I ignored the signs - in part, because I thought maybe I could ride it out but I’m now at breaking point.

I’m unable to sleep at all. I’m second guessing myself all the time. I’m at such a low ebb. I’m replaying moments over in my head constantly and worrying what people have thought about me, that I’ve ruined my friendships etc.

I rationally know things are pretty good. I have a supportive partner, a good job with an understanding boss, I’m about to move into a house with more space and I have friends. I exercise regularly and eat well. I can’t ynderstand what has triggered this anxiety.

I also feel extremely alone in this. I don’t want to tell anyone how I feel because it’s awkward. Everyone has been proud of me for getting better. My partner also suffers from depression which he finds harder to deal with than me with my anxiety. I’m conscious of putting this pressure on him.

I’m not in therapy at the moment and am desperately attempting to remember the techniques to talk myself out of feeling like this but I’ve never felt so bad, for no reason, so am unsure what to do.

Coming here for any advice or kind words as feeling quite lost and would like to help myself out of this without returning to medication.

Thanks for bearing with me!