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Trying hard to not fail

SoccergirlCasual Contributor17 Apr 2018, 10:38 pm AEST

Trying hard to not fail

I’m not planning anything but my thoughts are thinking suicide. Every time I close my eyes I see myself doing it. I’m scared. I don’t trust anyone. Idk how to make friends. I quit my job because I thought they were messing with me which they were. Idk who I am or who I was

5 replies

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In response to: Trying hard to not fail

AppleblossomSenior Contributor18 Apr 2018, 2:46 am AEST

Re: Trying hard to not fail

Hello @Soccergirl Welcome. I have played the odd game of Aussie rules ...

I personally have experienced a lot of suicidal thinking, but also lost 2 people I loved to suicide.

I hope you gain a sense of support from being involved. Some threads are more chatty and social. Suicidal thinking is not easy to manage, but it can be done. Talking with others can help gain distance from it, and realisation that you are not alone. The forum has guidelines to maximise our safety whist dealing with this tricky subject.

In response to: Trying hard to not fail

utopiaSenior Contributor18 Apr 2018, 10:10 pm AEST

Re: Trying hard to not fail

@Soccergirl. It sounds like you are dealing withthis all on your own. Is there ssomeone who you do trust? Or who you could confide in? As it's so hard to deal with suicidal thoughts on your own. I know from personal experience. I normally talk to my psychologist when I'm having too many thoughts about suicide.
Do you see a psychologist or counselor or psychiatrist? They can really help you.
Approaching your gp might be the first step. Explain you are struggling with these thoughts.Be honest about your capacity to keep yourself safe. Ask your gp for a referral to a psychologist.
I wonder if something has happened recently to trigger these thoughts.
Please feel free to talk more about what is happening for you, on this forum. I am happy to listen.

In response to: Trying hard to not fail

Ant7Senior Contributor18 Apr 2018, 10:21 pm AEST

Re: Trying hard to not fail

@Soccergirl I think I have some idea of how you feel and what you are going through. I too have reoccurring thoughts of suicide I have only once gone to the point of planning it and thankfully I had something change my mind. I also am not particularly happy at my work I always feel like the odd one out actually I feel like that in my life in general. I just wanted you to know that you are not alone and others are feeling like you do and that there are people here that will listen and help if they can ❤️

In response to: Trying hard to not fail

SoccergirlCasual Contributor19 Apr 2018, 4:45 am AEST

Re: Trying hard to not fail

Thank you all for the advice and comfort. I saw my psychologist yesterday and took my meds to calm the recurring tapes playing in my head. I’m glad I reached out to the forum and reached out to friends. Thank you. I wish I was not socially awkward to communicate with others but not be such a bothersome at the same time.

In response to: Re: Trying hard to not fail

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor19 Apr 2018, 10:37 am AEST

Re: Trying hard to not fail

Hi @Soccergirl and welcome to the forums .....

I can see you have already met some of our regulars, and I agree wholeheartedly with the advice they offered .... so glad you spoke to your counsellor. Having support from people who understand what you are going through makes a big difference.

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