Thanks for including me @Former-Member .....
Hi @Tissie74 and welcome to the forums .....
That’s a difficult situation you have got there. It’s awful when houseguests are not polite, and even worse I think when they are close family or friends because it stretches the relationship quite badly.
Telling you how you feel and criticising how you choose to manage your work situation is not polite ...... nor is leaving all the housework to you ..... and it is especially not polite to have a friend of theirs come to stay without asking you first ..... wow.
I have had family behave without respect towards me before, and the best advice I can offer you is to be very polite, but a bit removed ...... if it’s someone being very rude you can be frosty towards them, but mind your manners ..... because it’s a shield for you.
If you remain polite it’s actualy easier to begin asking things like -
“If you are going to leave the door to your room open, would you mind making the bed please ?”
“While you are out, would you mind picking up bread and milk for me please ?”
“Thank you for letting me know how you feel about what I shared with you, but ai am comfortable with my decision anyway.”
Can you see that it’s actually a way to tell her what you want her to do, or not do ? But it is said so politely it is hard for most people to get difficult with you about it, even if they are not comfortable with it. It creates a boundary and let’s them know that you expect to be respected.
You can try it if it sounds comfortable. It worked for me. I hope it works for you too.
