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Stressed no one to talk to

LoriaNew Contributor17 Mar 2018, 3:43 am AEDT

Stressed no one to talk to

My boyfriend is coming home from a deployment in a few days. I have been working two jobs and running myself ragged this week trying to all my “chores” to make everything perfect for him when he gets home. My day job I just started I’m in my second week and because I had closed at my night job the night before and would’ve only gotten 4 hours of sleep I slept throug my alarms and was really late for work. I was crying apologizeing telling my trainer that it won’t happen again and this job is soo important to me and it is I love it. She was extremely understanding and said she had also been late that day. Then today my I try to get a perscription from my psychiatrist by calling during my lunch and they said that they are closing early today and the only way I could get free samples that they’d offered because I have no insurance is to make it there before 12:45 or is have to wait until Monday we’ll i wasn’t about to pass up free meds versus 100 something dollars and I wasn’t going to skip several days so I asked if I could leave early and I explained the situation. Well my job is seasonal and I will be there for a couple months before they decide if they will lay me off or not so I’m stressing out beating myself up because I know my attendance look poor and my jobs are so important to me I called my boyfriend to talk to him and then explained the situation and he started telling me how bad that looks and I already feel so guilty my hairs going to fall out and he just poured salt in the wound. I’m trying my hardest I really am it’s not as if I just partied all night and came in late cuz of that or I just felt like going home no I’m sincerely trying to do everything and I have a couple months to prove I can be a good worker but he just hurt me by doing that. And I got soo angry with him I started yelling and hung up the phone and now I’m nauseous because I feel like everything is going to fall apart and it will be my fault. And I’m upset that I feel like he’s acting like I’m being irresponsible he doesn’t understand how important my Medecine is or my mental health he thinks I’m dramatic and it hurts I have real issues. You wouldn’t tell a diabetic to just go without there medication so why should I

3 replies

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In response to: Stressed no one to talk to

KobeCatSenior Contributor17 Mar 2018, 3:53 am AEDT

Re: Stressed no one to talk to

Hi @Loria

KobeCat here, the overnight moderator.

Sorry things have been so rough for you today... but welcome to the Sane community. I am hopeful that you will find this a safe space to seek support regarding matters impacting on your mental health.

As its quite late, there are not many members around at the minute. But spend some time reading or joining some of the more popular threads to get to know the community. Once again, Welcome!!

Regards.

Kobe.

In response to: Stressed no one to talk to

frogSenior Contributor17 Mar 2018, 8:03 am AEDT

Re: Stressed no one to talk to

Hi @Loria I think you were right to prioritise getting your medication. I am lucky to have stable employment but even so feel extremely torn whenever I need to take time off for appointments or if I'm unwell. It must be many times harder in your situation. I can also well understand getting angry with your boyfriend for being less than compassionate and not supporting you in making decisions under pressure. Maybe he was just fixated on the job, whereas you are trying to juggle competing demands. For me it's hard to maintain work and health. I'm not sure I understood about working 2 jobs - is that ongoing, or will you get to focus on one? Lack of sleep is the pits for me and I very quickly deteriorate in my ability to do much at all. It's not surprising at all that you are so stressed. Do you have anyone you can talk to or lean on until you are on more stable ground? The forums is good for that, though I do also wish for someone I could at least tell my struggles to in the 'real world'. Not many people get mental illness. Hoping the situation improves for you. Be kind to yourself.

In response to: Stressed no one to talk to

NatalieSSenior Contributor17 Mar 2018, 5:03 pm AEDT

Re: Stressed no one to talk to

Hi @Loria

I empathise with you in your current situation: you are stretching yourself to do the right thing by everyone but are running yourself ragged in the meantime. Please look after your own health, first and foremost, especially your mental health. For people who have never struggled with mental health issues, they often have no idea how those things impact on someone's life, from organising and attending medical, therapeutic and specialist appointments, as well as adjusting to different medications, as well as attempting to deal with all the day-to-day stuff (relationships, maybe kids, employment). And if you have a partner in the services it can be a lonely relationship as the partner is often not there when you are in meltdown mode and sometimes they just don't get the mental health stuff. Are you eligible for counselling through Veterans Counselling Service, 24/7 phone counselling, their phone number is 1800 011 046. ? This service has been a blessing for me and the counsellors are non-judgmental and always listen. Maybe its worth giving them a call to ask. Take care.

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