Need advice Please: Partner left, lost baby & stalking

Hi all, I need quite a bit of advice and you can be brutally honest and even give me the verbal slap.
I hope this makes sense.
I have been on amd off with my partner for 7 years. Every time he leaves me he is on dating and hook up sites. He then comes back. Treats me badly. The highs are as good as the lows.
This time it does seem final.
Probably too much to go in to as to what hapoened but this ended when he just lost license for 10months due to drug driving, he smokes pot. We both started businesses recently. I offered to drive him everywhere but then thought about it amd said I don't know if I can for 10months. Maybe you should start cutting down. And it blew up.
So this is upsetting.

But I was pregnant and he was so happy. He left me and said he hopes it dies and I'm smart for keeping a baby from a broken relationship. But even tho he left I felt such joy inside that I was having a baby. But today it seems I have lost it now 😞 I am devastated and gutted.

Then my 3rd problem is I am an obsessive stalker. And I mean bad. I can't stop and now he has blocked me I am worse. And it isn't just a thing where you can say distract yourself and block him, talk to someone, do something else. I mean I have done this for years that is how I found out he is now already one 4 hook up dating sites now. The day he left he made them. How is that love??

I love him so much. But how do I stop the stalking and please I need hard core practical stuff not the generic stuff. It is very serious.

I have bipolar, borderline personality disorder and dependency disorder.
Thankyou