My Story

Hi @LeedsUnitedFan
Welcome to the forums, i think it probably was hard to put that all out there so to speak, so thank you for sharing with us. I was thinking as i read that there must be a lot of anxiety going on with social situations/high pressure situations? have you ever had any support or help with that side of things from a counsellor/psychologist? I am doing cbt stuff i think at the moment *again... with my therapist and trying to work through the types of thoughts i have that lead to particular behaviours and outcomes.. find it very hard and so slow but still hope for some positive changes that might lead to more social interaction (of which i have virtually none). Being/feeling alone is really hard!
I hope that you find the forums a supportive and friendly place, as I have!
take care and hope to see you around!

*edited because I didn't tag name correctly 🙂

Welcome @LeedsUnitedFan and thank you for your courage in sharing your journey.

As @Former-Member has already mentioned, I picked up on some social anxiety reading your post. Would you tend to agree? It can be very isolating and alienating feeling different from those around you, especially in a social setting. Have you ever talked to a psychologist or counsellor about how you feel? I used to feel extremely socially awkward around my peers (especially as I see them as successful in life, whereas I see myself as failing in major areas). I had extensive cognitive behavioural therapy (cbt) with a good psychologist and bit by bit crept out in a social setting amongst my peers once again. It might be different for you, but talking about my anxieties surrounding failure (or perceived failure) really helped me to cope and challenge that negative thinking fuelling my social anxiety.

These days, I've come a long way. I wouldn't say I am 'cured', but I am definitely more comfortable in my own skin.

I hope to read more of your journey around the boards. I do hope you'll find the boards as safe and supportive as I do.

Take it easy,

Q

Hi @LeedsUnitedFan,

I can relate to a lot of what you say in your post. I am a 40 year old woman and I have never had a romantic relationship aside from an icky abuse situation when I was a young teen and my "partner" was a 32 year old youth group leader.

I have Asperger's syndrome, which was undiagnosed until I figured it out about 3 years ago. Getting that diagnosis hasn't in any way helped me be less, well, aspie, but it has very much helped me to understand some of the struggles I've had over the years in areas such as employment and relationships. Prior to getting that diagnosis all of my muddles were squished into the box of my psychiatric diagnosis (borderline personality disorder).

These days I feel much more ok about my quirks, although I do still struggle with being socially isolated as I don't have any "friends and family." Hence I tend to float around Forum Land quite a lot. I hope that being here in Forum Land can similarly help you to feel a little bit less alone.

Ps. I both followed your post and made it through to the end. What do I get to trade my twenty points for?

Wow, good on you for going to the board games night tomorrow night. Sounds like a really positive step in your journey. I do hope it all goes well with the meetup group! 🙂