2 modes. Extremely calm and panic attack mode

My life in general is ok. Kids, partner, love, fortunate etc. Even with this, I've been experiencing bouts of anxiety and panic attacks for the last 2 years. It is usually triggered when I see things that could possibly go wrong and if I don't have the immediate skills or time to rectify. I'll be returning to a work after 4 or 5 years off on a part time basis. The role is technical and very different to 5 years ago. They know my situation is one that I need to get up to speed and seem ok with it but I'm terrified of having a panic attack and quitting prematurely. I know that if I can get through the first month I'll be ok. Really hope that I can calmly rationalise my fears when the time comes. My husband tries to calm me but he doesn't understand anxiety. He is the most extremely calm person I know. My sisters and father suffer from anxiety too. Some generalised and some OCD. I can see my eldest daughter showing anxiety symptoms and I feel terrible for her. I try and only show my calm side to her in hopes that it will help her. My life outside of these anxious panics is lovely and I feel guilty for complaining. I use sudoku puzzles to help my mind not focus on fear and it seems to work short term. My husband asked if I could change anything about myself, what would it be. It wasn't any of my physical features. It was to remove anxiety. My last attack was a month ago when I had the flu. I couldn't even sit on the couch. I sat on the floor near the window near the sunshine and sooked and breathed. The anxiety didn't leave me for 10 days. That's the longest it has happened and I suspect it was fuelled by having the flu as well as minor issues that my mind blew out of proportion. I don't really had a question but it is nice to be able to say this to others who might understand. Thank you x