Why am I invisible to others?

Am I too ordinary? Too beige? It makes me so sad when I try my hardest in RL to have friends and mean something to people, but instead, I am generally forgotten by my family and friends. I have my Mrs, yes, but most of the time she is too busy to pay me much attention.

Don't get me wrong I am not an attention seeking person. Maybe that's my problem? I've been volunteering for ages in a peer support role and while I make sure everyone is equally supported and those in crisis are catered for, others get the thanks instead. Just because I'm not seen as a load of fun and games and tackle the more serious subjects surrounding mental health. It kind of gets me down sometimes, it really does. Just because I take mental health, SI and SH and all the grisly side of mental health seriously.

In the non-virtual world, I have few real friends. The last so-called friend I had took my credit card without my permission several times and stole money from my account and charged things fraudulently to my card. Generally, she took advantage of me. I find making friends so difficult probably because, in the non-virtual world, I am really shy. I am also forgotten by my family. It has been months now since I last spoke to my Father and although months ago I invited him to lunch, still nothing has come of it. I know they hate me anyway. My Father has even said this to my face and told me he wished I was never born.

I guess in an extraordinary world we live in today, I sadly do not fit in.