I can't stop

Also i am really mad at my doctor and everyone thb i dont even know why but it is like i just hate everything and i want to rip my hair out and sometimes everything is going fast in my head but ohter times i just feel normal and then i am like well maybe there is nothing wrong and i kind of dont think there is like maybe something is just sending me bad energies and i dont know who or what also there is an evil spirit following me and he wont leave me alone and i am getting freally annoyed and i keep wanting to tell it to F-off but then i am like that is rude and i dont really want to be rude but like ugh i am just so annoyed at literally every little thing and honestly i feel like strangeling something like i wont but i feel like it and part of me doesnt want to sleep and then also i feel kind of tired but not as tired as i should and and no one listens to me and i screwed everything up with my rabbit so now she doesnt like hugs and only likes to be petted and ugh i just i want to yell at everything and sometimes i get mad at plants because they are annoying but then i feel bad cause i can feel their energy and stuff and i dont want them to get bad energy and like i feel like i cant be open with my mental health workers because they wont believe me about a lot of things and i just feel this huge pressure inside of me and i cant make it stop or get rid of it and i try and exercise but like then there is just more and i am pretty sure someone is trying to hex me and ugh i cant i just i want to scream everything is so annyoing and i am sorry this is also so long i feel like i could keep going forever i dont even know what about well i mean there is a lot going on and i just i am holding it in because i dont want them to find out like last time because that was bad and i need to feel more again and someone/thing is trying to get into my head and ugh i cant this is too much.

Hello @Eden1919

I can hear a lot of anger and frustration coming through, you said you have tried exercising to release it but that has not helped, is there something else that has helped you deal with anger before? For me I sometimes find some more relaxing things help me to calm down, as well as listening to soem music that makes me sing loudly, that can also let it out. Maybe you could try something else today?

Lunar

@Former-Member I have tried everything i can think of it is just not working like if i get rid of any of it more just comes back in its place. and i dont even know why i am so irritable like i have no reason to be and i just cant everything feels so weird and i dont know i just i cant explain it but i want to shout and i need to fix everything and ugh i just cant deal with this.

also i keep feeling like everything needs to be faster.

@Eden1919 There's a lot of content from last night in your posts, I'm wondering if you feel like you need to keep everything inside you and you can't tell anyone about it. I'm not sure what you've used before, but would you want to talk to a crisis counsellor about what's happening? There's a lot of pressure and frustration that's not helping with exercise or other strategies, so if you feel as if you can't talk to your m.h. workers perhaps give Lifleine a call?

@Former-Member Iended up going on the lifeline chat last night at about 3am and it wasnt helpful really but i dont know what would be helpful. nothing seems to work and i am getting really agiatated and i just i cant make my head stop and the reason i cant talk to the mental health workers is because they will try and get me back on meds and that would be bad because the meds will hurt me and ugh everything is just too much and i cant take it and i need to get out of here cause i just i need to be with nature but i dont know where i need to go and it is confusing and i dont know how to explain it and ugh i just dont know what to do anymore.

Hi @Eden1919

have things settled for you today, or are you still feeling 'pressured'?

@-karma- nope nothing has settled i still feel very pressured 😞 it is getting frustrating i am having to force myself to not yell at everyone for doing things slowly. i am trying to focus my energy on my language studies but i cant do one thing for long either.