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NeySenior Contributor
In response to: I could really use a friend
TRIANGLEContributor
@Ney
Hey you have come to right place for friendship and undrstanding.
In response to: I could really use a friend
NeySenior Contributor
In response to: Re: I could really use a friend
MagicAntSenior Contributor
Hey @Ney, would you like to talk about what you are going through and how you are feeling today?
In response to: I could really use a friend
Unknown userMember
Hi @Ney
You posted in the right place as you have friends here who relate to how you are feeling and will support you through this anxious time. You are definitely not alone. Talk about anything that your mood dictates and we happily join in when we can
In response to: I could really use a friend
NeySenior Contributor
In response to: Re: I could really use a friend
Unknown userMember
Good to hear from you @Ney
Facebook doesn't do much for me either as it can be a bit fake at times. Nothing is better than a good laugh and talk with someone in person - always lifts me.
The catch 22 with depression is that we are less likely to go out and socialise to find those connections. Do you find that? I have had to push myself something savage to get out the door lately and I have always felt better for it.
That is a good first step having a shower when we are feeling so low. I know the feeling. Even that effort does help us to feel a little better. Well done. Are you seeing anyone for your depression and/or taking something to help cope?
I have been part of support groups face to face also in the past which I found was good when I needed to talk to someone. I could either attend meetings or phone someone in the group when feeling down.
Baby steps are all we can do sometimes when all just seems like too much - one day at a time. Do you find music helps lift your mood at these times?
In response to: I could really use a friend
NeySenior Contributor
In response to: Re: I could really use a friend
MagicAntSenior Contributor
Hey @Ney, I know it would sound like something trivial to someone without mental illness, but taking a shower is something you should be proud of. Even when I am at my lowest, I always push myself to have a shower. I always feel better physically and mentally, and it makes me feel that having achieved that, I can move on to something else. As @Former-Member said, baby steps.
it also a part of a daily routine that you should try to develop and maintain. He bout of bed, shower, get dressed, eat, etc. Are there any quiet places to walk near where you live? Fortunately, where I am there are plenty of parks and well established paths that are relatively quiet, and I make a habit of going for a walk when the sun is high enough in the sky. The sunlight helps maintain your body clock, which is an important thing to maintain when you are depressed. The warmth of the sun on these cold winter mornings also makes me good both on the outside and on the inside. And don't tell anyone, but it makes me feel a bit like Supermab soaking in the sun's radiation, making me feel stronger! Though, I still haven't been able to fly yet! 😉
Other than this forum (and silly cat videos), I try to stay offline when I am feeling down. Social media in particular tends to aggravate my symptoms, so I give it a miss (truth be told, I try to give it a miss even when I'm feeling OK, because I'm not particularly interested in the latest item of activewear a girl I knew from 30 years ago just bought from Lorna Jane, or how the NutriBullet has changed her life!)
What sort of music are you into? Do you play a musical instrument? I play in a covers band, and at times I feel that without the band and my music, I'd have nothing (other than an awesome collection of Star Wars Lego!) When I'm down, I put on th music that makes me happy, really loud, and I sing along!
Just remember, however lonely you feel, there will always be someone on here to chat with, so you'll never be alone.
In response to: Re: I could really use a friend
TRIANGLEContributor
I hear you @I could really use a friend bout the music.
I thought i would put on music to cheer myselfe up and relaised after a few tears that I was in the zone of depressing songs.
In response to: Re: I could really use a friend
Unknown userMember
I have to admit @Ney that I am guilty of listening to "blue" music when I have been really low (music like "alone again naturally"- ugh it didn't help at all). Sometimes I listen to music that will bring back good memories and this can make me feel better.
Sorry to read of the breakup of your relationship - people won't understand depression unless they have been through it and even then circumstances can be different. To me it's about accepting people the way they are...
It so typical of depression to feel so utterly alone in it and feel very different. But the reality is we all have similar needs and it's finding those few special others whom we can relate to and whom relate to us. You are relating to me now and I to you - we are connecting. It's not easy to find someone who is willing to listen to us in their busy world. Unfortunately it's the way of the world to be too busy for others most of the time. I like to make time for others where I can expecting nothing in return - but in time I usually find friendships form as a result. It just takes time to get to know someone and nurture trust. The latter I find is so important.
What I have found helps me is that when I am with people I try and put most of my focus on them and not listen to how I feel - as feelings are deceptive and our minds can trick us when depressed. So I keep putting myself out there and trying. Sometimes this works with positive experiences of connecting with others and other times is does not. But it's worth it for the good experiences. I have to ignore and fight how I am feeling to do this. It gets a bit easier with practise, but never easy. Just worth it in the long run. You will make relationships in time.
What activities do you enjoy doing?
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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